description of emotional shredding

greenspun.com : LUSENET : Domestic Violence Accounts : One Thread

Fourteen years ago I was in a relationship that I experienced the three stages of abuse verbal, mental and emotional. The first two stages was just the beginning the last is still active to a degree. Its been 9 years now of haveing no contact at all with FREDDY however the way he has left me is overwhelming. My experience with emotional abuse was devestating. I literately felt my inner being actually being shredded, it was the worst feeling I had ever felt (I would have rather got a Hawaiian Punch oppose to feeling this pain) It was a pain deep down in the middle of my stomach that gave way and caved in and just clamped down so hard it made me buckle, it was a feeling of my inner being going through a paper shredder with no exageration. I could feel the inside of my cavity tear piece by piece and afterwards I could actually feel a large tear, wound, laseration inside of me. It took years to heal but the scab still lays within and is very sensative to direct comments...my question is this after years of the single streak keeping self banned from all male species I encountered a man that I fell in love with but my experience in the past is inflickting my relationship I have informed him of what I went through but he just dont understand the true meaning of being emtionally shredded....is there anything out there that best describes what i went through Please Help.

-- Anonymous, April 29, 2003

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