A Parady--The Suburban Youth Centered Church

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(Any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely on purpose. nib)


Men's Business Meeting

Place: Church library Time: Lord's Day afternoon Characters:

Bros. Eldership 1, 2, 3, 4 Bro. Professional Pulpit Minster Bro. Song Leader Bro. Young Youth Director Bro. Worship Director Bro. Concern Bro. Timid Other Bros.

Bro. Eldership # 1 stands and begins to speak. "Welcome to you all. We Elderships have spent many hours and fervent prayer before we called this meeting. Bros. Eldership # 2, please word our prayer for the success of this fine meeting."

Bro. Eldership # 2 stands and words the prayer, reminding God of how important the youth are to that fine Church and asking Him to smile on this fine Eldership's plan.

Bro. Eldership #1, "Thank you, Bro. Eldership #2 for that fine prayer. Now down to the business at hand. We have added two new staff members to the leadership of this fine Church: Bro. Young Youth Director and Bro. Worship Director. With these most important added staff members to the leadership of this fine Church, there will be no limit to our great growth. Our youth are being drawn away by the Baptist down the street. Their youth program is in a class of its own. The Baptist built their fine gymnasium where the youth can go every day for recreation. Their desire is to compete with the world in satisfying the youth's needs for entertainment."

Bro. Eldership #3 whispers to Bro. Professional Pulpit Minister, "Oh, no. I was hoping Bro. concern couldn't make this meeting today, but there he is."

Bro. Concern, "Excuse me, but is it our duty to entertain the youth? Didn't God place that responsibility on the parents?"

Bro. Eldership #1, "Now, Bro. Concern, you have not heard our plan. Please hold your remarks and questions until we unfold our godly plan."

Bros. Eldership 2, 3, 4, "Amen."

Bro. Eldership #1 continues, "The main purpose for the plan will be carried out by Bro. Professional Pulpit Minister, Bro. Young Youth Director, Bro. Worship Director and Bro Song Leader. And of course by us all as we hold up the hands of these God-directed Ministers."

Bro. Professional Pulpit Minister, "We have had our private meeting and we accept the direction of the fine Eldership."

Bro. Eldership #1, "Thank you for your full support, Bro. PPM. We are sure your pulpit will be a place of great encouragement to the youth. They are not interested in the sermons of the past, but want more stories and jokes to keep their interest. And Bro. Song Leader, your part will also be of most importance. The old-time songs are out of style for the youth today. They want the fast, upbeat songs that they can sway and clap to. After all, this is what they are use to in their everyday lives in our today culture.

Bro. Song Leader, "No problem here, Bro. Eldership #1. I have already started learning their types of songs. They will be lively and will move them emotionally."

Bro. Eldership #1, "Thank you for your support, Bro. Song Leader. And Bro. Young Youth Director, you come to us highly recommended as someone who can relate to the youth on their level. You will be in charge of the activities of the youth. You must keep them busy with field trips and get togethers, encouraging them to bring their friends to all your planned activities for them. Over-night lock-ins are popular now and we will depend on you to plan those, also."

Bro. Concern, "Excuse me, but isn't Bro. Young Youth Director a little young for such responsibilities? Is he far from the age of the youth themselves??

Bro. Eldership #1, "Don't you see, Bro. Concern? He is ideal for the job because the youth will bond with him, knowing he is one of them, AND not some fudy dudy who doesn't understand them."

Bro. Young Youth Director, "The Eldership will not be disappointed. Where I was before the youth grew by leaps and bounds."

Bro. Timid, "But Bro. YYD, weren't you asked to leave your last place?"

Bro. Eldership #1, "Now, we know all about that. It was nothing that was Bro. YYD's fault. Now the last person we will depend on for this change is our new Bro. Worship Director. We no longer want a solemn, boring Worship Service. Those are out of style. The whole service must be planned around the youth, who soon will be the leaders, themselves."

Bro. Concern (to himself), "Oh, brother."

Bro. Eldership #1, "That concludes the business at this time. We are in the process of planning a very large gymnasium but we will tell you about that at a later date as our plans are more crystallized. Now, the fine ladies who love to serve us at these meetings have prepared coffee and sandwiches so let us adjourn to the dining area.

And they did.

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-- Nelta Brock (nib@hal-pc.org), March 16, 2003

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