What men like in a woman

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A man is dating three women and wants to decide which to marry. He decides to give them a test.

He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.

The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.

The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.

The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.

The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money, and then he married the one with the biggest boobs.

Men are men.

-- (oooh@yeah.baby), May 10, 2002

Answers

Were they real?

-- Carlos (riffraff@cybertime.net), May 10, 2002.

What men like "in" a woman? Are you kidding?

-- (nemesis@awol.com), May 11, 2002.

LOL! Big boobs definitely attract attention.

-- Pammy (pamela_sue57@hotmail.com), May 12, 2002.

Nemisis has the right answer once again.

-- Jack Booted Thug (governmentconspiracy@NWO.com), May 12, 2002.

The sweet smell of freshly washed and combed hair is a killer for me.

Tits? Long as they aint fake they're all good.

-- Carlos (riffraff@cybertime.net), May 16, 2002.



Any bigger than a mouthful is a waste.

-- (roland@hatemail.com), May 17, 2002.

Yeah sure, that's why breast implants have been a multi-million dollar industry.

-- (cin@cin.cin), May 17, 2002.

Implants are okay for looking, but not much fun for playing with. The reason they are a multi-million dollar industry is because they prop up the insecure egos of millions of women, not because they satisfy men.

-- (nothin.like@real.thing), May 17, 2002.

Wrong.

The real reason is because men place women like Pamela Anderson (known primarily for her IQ? eh.. NO) on a level and physically compare other women to them.

Did you know that men used to bind womens feet so they would be tiny? What is that you say, women did it because of low self-esteem? Uh...NO

-- (cin@cin.cin), May 17, 2002.


“Did you know that men used to bind womens feet so they would be tiny?”

I thought that was done to keep them away from the mall.

-- Free (head@case.analysis), May 17, 2002.



Pam Anderson is gross. Her lips look ridiculous and the rest of her looks like a goddamn blow-up doll. I don't know any actual real people who find her attractive in the least. I mean, look at the guys she ends up with.

If a woman is smart, she'll realize that if she tries to look like Pam Anderson, then she too will end up with some scumbag abusive loser like Pam did. You'd think she'd be the best argument against breast implants.

They always have stories about these women who are practically addicted to plastic surgery and liposuctions and collegen implants and all this other crap. I have never in my life ever heard any guy say "Damn, I wish she'd go get her lips puffed up with collegen!!"

Nobody puts a gun to these people's heads to make them do this. The only one who really makes out on this deal are the doctors.

-- (what@i.think), May 17, 2002.


The last I heard she was talking about a breast reduction.

It seems to moi that women who get breast enlargements get them mostly for their own personal reasons, putting the onous (sp?) on men seems mis-directed.

Iv'e got nothing against them nor an affection for them, if the chick is cool I'm cool with that. Personality rules : ) If she likes to party a lil that's a bonus.

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), May 17, 2002.


"The real reason is because men place women like Pamela Anderson (known primarily for her IQ? eh.. NO) on a level and physically compare other women to them. "

And instead of realizing that it doesn't matter what men think, women demonstrate their insecurity by getting breast implants.

-- lol (i rest @ my. case), May 17, 2002.


What men like in a woman???

Dicken's Cider....

(snicker)

Sniffin' the company...

The Dog

-- The Dog (dogdesert@hotmail.com), May 17, 2002.


**They always have stories about these women who are practically addicted to plastic surgery and liposuctions and collegen implants and all this other crap. I have never in my life ever heard any guy say "Damn, I wish she'd go get her lips puffed up with collegen!!" **

I disagree. Read the first paragraph of this thread again, sure it's a joke but it's also based on the reality that most everyone has come to realize. If you were to have a line-up of women, and have males choose at first glance which they would prefer, I guarantee you most would choose the one with the biggest boobs, biggest lips, blondest hair, least cellulite and fat.

Cap you are the exception, and that's why you're already taken ;o)

-- (cin@cin.cin), May 17, 2002.



Not me! I look for the biggest account portfolio.

-- Candy Man (on@the.prowl), May 17, 2002.

If you were to have a line-up of women, and have males choose at first glance which they would prefer, I guarantee you most would choose the one with the biggest boobs, biggest lips, blondest hair, least cellulite and fat.

LOL. Well, if you're already going to degrade women by lining them up like a meat-market and asking men which they "prefer at first glance" like they're shopping for a goddamn CAR, then what the hell would you expect?? If you create a situation that is inherently degrading, as you have done here, then the result will be equally degrading.

One could create an identical situation by lining up men, and the women would undoubtedly choose the tallest ones with the biggest muscles and cock. Does that prove anything? Of course not.

-- (what@i.think), May 17, 2002.


Good grief, it was an analogy

-- (cin@cin.cin), May 17, 2002.

Yes, and it was a stupid one. {major eye roll}

-- (what@i.think), May 17, 2002.

So I guess you can't handle someone's disagreeing with you?

-- (cin@cin.cin), May 17, 2002.

Don't forget the Brazilian wax ladies

-- (nemesis@awol.com), May 17, 2002.

Have you any idea how horrible it is when the hair grows back? You have never experienced torment like this before. And you'd better be put into a drug-induced coma while they are ripping your pubic hair out by the roots, not pleasant.

-- (her name@is . Rio), May 17, 2002.

So I guess you can't handle someone's disagreeing with you?

Of course I can. I guess you can't handle when someone points out that you've made a stupid irrelevant analogy that completely misses the point?

-- (what@i.think), May 18, 2002.


I liked it better when the pubes peaked out from the bathing suit; especially when wet and they'd be plastered down the thigh.

-- (Raoul@Brazilian wax.museum), May 18, 2002.

Okay I'll speak more slowly and say it just so you can understand.

If faced with a choice, men would prefer "perfect-looking" women, even if cosmetically enhanced. And obviously have trouble admitting it.

Is there anything else I can help you with? = )

-- (cin@cin.cin), May 18, 2002.


Cin--

Do women dress/cosmetize/surgically alter themseves for the benefit of men, of other women, for themselves or for some combination of the above? An old question but relevant methinks.

Personally I have always judged women soley by their inner beauty.

-- (lars@indy.net), May 18, 2002.


Lars,

there are men and women who seek cosmetic surgery to improve their quality of life and/or to make body parts proportionate. For instance, a breast reduction or lift, a nose reduction/shaping, a chin implant, a correction for "spock" ears.

There are those who do it for success in their occupations: actors, strippers, those in the public eye. Some may call this vain, everyone has a differing opinion on it.

And then those who do it because yah they are insecure and are searching for acceptance or love or something and they think these procedures will somehow how make their life all better. Usually they have more than one procedure done. These can include breast enlargements, lip enlargments, liposuction, face lifts, etc.

And there are some women who have procedures done at the goading of their men, yes believe it.

As far as dressing, I can only speak for myself. If I am IN THE MOOD to turn heads (rarely lol) then I will dress for it. But usually I just prefer be comfortable. When I was younger, I would opt more for looks over comfort, but no longer. And I actually think comfortable LOOKS better. I guess I'm just getting old =o)

-- (cin@cin.cin), May 18, 2002.


"If faced with a choice, men would prefer "perfect-looking" women, even if cosmetically enhanced. And obviously have trouble admitting it."

And women have trouble admitting that they get boob jobs because they are insecure and trying to please chauvinistic pigs instead of themselves.

-- (boobs@brainless.bimbos), May 18, 2002.


If faced with a choice, men would prefer "perfect-looking" women, even if cosmetically enhanced. And obviously have trouble admitting it.

Is there anything else I can help you with? = )

Actually, yes. You could provide some evidence of this assertion of yours.

-- (what@i.think), May 18, 2002.


Don't mind cin, she just has an inferiority complex. She doesn't get laid because she's a bitch, then she blames it on men and better looking women.

-- bwaahaha (big@time.pms), May 19, 2002.

Of course Repugs don't like women. All they can talk (obsess) about is what is in Clinton's underwear.

-- (repugs@all.gay), May 19, 2002.

I like a woman with a fine sense of humor (which means she laughs at my wonderful jokes).

-- Peter Errington (petere7@starpower.net), May 19, 2002.

Eeeeew, I'd bever be seen with a dood that wears cutoff jeans. Gross!

Men's 5 worst summer fashion blunders

-- (Missy@club.X), May 19, 2002.


Newsflash for hawk or doc or whoever you are...women can't stand men who blame the ills of the world on pms. If you really hate women so much, or you ever expect to have a good relationship with a female, then get some therapy or something. And good grief, take some resposibility for yourself. You are an asshole. Just what sort of reaction do you expect to get from people anyway?

-- (cin@cin.cin), May 19, 2002.

Actually, yes. You could provide some evidence of this assertion of yours.

-- (what@i.think), May 18, 2002.

So you say. I disagree. Since you are the one making the assertion, either provide the link or quote them.

-- Little Nipper (canis@minor.net), May 20, 2002.

what@I.think = Little Nipper

-- (major@eye.roll), May 20, 2002.


They forgot one fashion blunder, men in jeans with thong sandals, ick. See that around here all the time

-- (thanks@no.thanks), May 20, 2002.

Asking for evidence means that I'm Little Nipper?

Do you have any evidence of this??

LOL

-- (what@i.think), May 20, 2002.


women can't stand men who blame the ills of the world on pms.

Men can't stand women who blame the ills of the world on men.

-- (what@i.think), May 20, 2002.


Who the hell cares, and who needs a fucking man anyway.

Oh damn I need my car worked on. I need my mechanic.

-- (if the@shoe.fits), May 20, 2002.


Cin,

When I was in high school, I was madly in love with a girl who was a stick. Pretty face, but her body was laid out with a ruler.

I'm convinced that one reason for the high divorce rate is that too many people think that sex is love. If you subtract the sex and find yourself looking at a person with whom you have nothing in common and very little to talk about, that relationship will eventually fall into trouble.

Or, as Sandy puts it, make sure that you're friends with someone BEFORE you move on to the serious stuff.

I fell in love with Sandy on one of our first business trips when she laughed. Something about that laugh conquered me. I still get tickled when I think about it; I can't explain it. :)

I discovered that Sandy and I could talk, for hours on end, about anything that popped into our heads. She's not just my lover, she's my best friend, who always listens. I hope she feels the same about me.

Hey, I'm human, with normal male hormones. Do I *notice* a girl with a killer body? Sure I do. (I'll even take a second look from time to time. Two billion years of evolution, y'know.[g])

But that's not what I was looking for in someone to spend the rest of my life with. The fact that Sandy is very pretty (TOO pretty for a hound dog like me, that's for sure!) is just a bonus, as far as I'm concerned. :)

Try this experiment sometime. Go to a nightclub where the women are wearing "do-me!" heels and streetwalker getup to "attract" a man. Watch what happens when a pretty girl-next-door type walks in wearing a nice, but fairly ordinary dress. No boobs wiggling, no butt jiggling; just pretty.

Most of the men will move away from the floozies toward that girl. Happens every time. And the floozies are always exasperated and baffled at why this should happen.

I'm amazed at how many girls can't figure this out. They'll pour themselves into a pair of stretch jeans, get a boob job and jiggle and wiggle all night long, thinking that will attract a man.

It will, but usually the wrong KIND of man and for the wrong reasons.

-- Stephen (smpoole7@bellsouth.net), May 20, 2002.


"Who the hell cares, and who needs a fucking man anyway."

ME!!! : )

-- Pammy (pamela_sue57@hotmail.com), May 21, 2002.


Me too sister! I like em big and stupid so they will pay my rent, buy me things, and make sure I cum first! Men are so easy to manipulate, aren't they Pammy?

-- (Slutty__Suzy@hotmail.com), May 21, 2002.

Stephen you're a hellova guy! I never noticed that in a club, just the leeches looking for a one night.

Lars I think that women get the surgery because of insecurity but insecurity stemmed from men around them. Women wouldn't do this horrible thing to their bodies if it weren't for the men in their lives pointing in that direction. Stephen said that he still looks. Well, imagine a woman with a man who constantly looks but doesn't give her any confidence about their relationship. She'll end up believing that she needs to change her own looks. So I guess, yes it comes down to doing it for men, nothing more.

-- Maria (anon@ymous.com), May 21, 2002.


I'm not into the club scene, never have been, but I read an article about the DC club scene a few years ago (in the Washington City Paper, an excellent freebee publication). The main thing I remember about the article was how these women, all dolled up, would be immediately beastly rude to any man who approached them who was not what they were looking for.

-- Peter Errington (petere7@starpower.net), May 21, 2002.

I'm not sure that I have ever seen "do me" heels, but then again I don't get out much. Can anyone provide a description so that I don't miss any subtle signs that may come my way in the future.

-- Jack Booted Thug (governmentconspiracy@NWO.com), May 21, 2002.

Jack, if you have to ask you don’t need to know.

-- Send (mo@money.please), May 21, 2002.

Stephen: My dad chose my mom for her laugh.

I think there's a whole lot of generalizing going on in this thread. SOME men are attracted to large breasts. SOME men are attracted to a great butt. SOME men are attracted to long legs. SOME men like to feel bones clicking against bones. SOME men like to feel CUSHIONED. The same holds true of women. While jogging with a neighbor woman, I mentioned the "eye candy" that another woman and I saw jogging on a park trail. *I*'m attracted to a firm butt. SHE said that she never paid any attention to a guy's butt.

I once worked with a woman who [in MY mind] had a body to die for...pretty, busty, tall, blonde, etc. More the "girl next door" type, myself, I mentioned my envy to some male co-workers. Only ONE found her the least bit attractive...at least that's what they told me.

I can send you a few pair of "DO ME" heels, Cornboy. My oldest wore them to clubs, learned they were uncomfortable, and they're STILL in the trunk of my car.

-- Anita (Anita_S3@hotmail.com), May 21, 2002.


Send, my first thought in reading JBT's response was what a geek!

The following is an excerpt from the July 1943 issue of Transportation Magazine. This was serious and written for male supervisors of women in the work force during World War II - a mere 59 years ago! Obviously, the intent was not to be "funny," but by today's standards, this is hilarious!

For those of you with efficiency issues, pay attention to #8.

Eleven Tips on Getting More Efficiency Out of Women Employees: There is no longer any question whether transit companies should hire women for jobs formerly held by men. The draft and manpower shortage has settled that point.

The important things now are to select the most efficient women available and how to use them to the best advantage. Here are eleven helpful tips on the subject: 1. Pick young married women. They usually have more of a sense of responsibility than their unmarried sisters. They are less likely to be flirtatious. They need the work, or they would not be doing it. They still have the pep and interest to work hard and to deal with the public efficiently.

2. When you have to use older women, try to get ones who have worked outside the home at some time in their lives. Older women who have never contacted the public have a hard time adapting themselves and are inclined to be cantankerous and fussy. It is always well to impress upon older women, the importance of friendliness and courtesy.

3. General experience indicates that "husky" girls - those who are just a little on the heavy side - are more even tempered and efficient than their underweight sisters.

4. Retain a physician to give each woman you hire a special physical examination - one covering female conditions. This step not only protects the property against the possibilities of lawsuit, but reveals whether the employee-to-be has any female weaknesses which would make her mentally or physically unfit for the job.

5. Stress at the outset, the importance of time; the fact that a minute or two lost here and there makes serious inroads on schedules. Until this point is gotten across, service is likely to be slowed up.

6. Give the female employee a definite day-long schedule of duties so that they will keep busy without bothering the management for instructions every few minutes. Numerous properties say that women make excellent workers when they have their jobs cut out for them, but that they lack initiative in finding work themselves.

7. Whenever possible, let the inside employee change from one job to another at some time during the day. Women are inclined to be less nervous and happier with change.

8. Give every girl an adequate number of rest periods during the day. You have to make some allowances for feminine psychology. A girl has more confidence and is more efficient if she can keep her hair tidied, apply fresh lipstick and wash her hands several times a day.

9. Be tactful when issuing instructions or in making criticisms. Women are often sensitive; they can't shrug off harsh words the way men do. Never ridicule a woman - it breaks her spirit and cuts off her efficiency.

10. Be reasonably considerate about using strong language around women. Even though a girl's husband or father may swear vociferously, she'll grow to dislike a place of business where she hears too much of this.

11. Get enough size variety in operator's uniforms so that each girl can have a proper fit. This point can't be stressed too much in keeping women happy."

-- Maria (anon@ymous.com), May 21, 2002.


JBT--

Here ya go. Also known as FM or CFM pumps.

Maria--

Funny, where did you find that? A good piece to show to those who say there has been "no progress".

-- (lars@indy.net), May 21, 2002.


Even though it is was written 59 years ago, it still holds true today. We still use those guidelines today because women haven't changed a bit. If anything they are more of a pain in the ass. We've added another tip about not looking at them or they will sue for sexual harrassment.

-- CEO (Fortune@500.Corporation), May 21, 2002.

Um, Slutty Suzy, you and I see men quite differently... sorry.

Maria, that was priceless! Thanks!

I loved the link for shoes, too. Sensual toe cleavage. LOL!

-- Pammy (pamela_sue57@hotmail.com), May 21, 2002.


Stephen said that he still looks. Well, imagine a woman with a man who constantly looks but doesn't give her any confidence about their relationship.

Sandy and I are wierd; we'll sit and watch television and critique people together. "He's good-looking." "She's a kewpie doll." "Hair By Mattel!"

She'll end up believing that she needs to change her own looks. So I guess, yes it comes down to doing it for men, nothing more.

And that's sad. I have met very few ugly people in my life (and most of those were ugly in personality). We're all different. I've never been one to consider plastic surgery and neither has Sandy. We is what we is.

(Of course, in my case, DuPont would have to schedule overtime and dedicate an entire's month production for the effort, but that's beside the point.[g])

Next experiment: sit and look at your toes sometime. Just stare at them for awhile. (Don't do it when someone is watching, or they'll become very concerned.) Toes are just plain ODD looking and there's no way to make them look better.

But when you love someone, you love their toes, too.

Now THAT'S deep, huh? :)

-- Stephen (smpoole7@bellsouth.net), May 21, 2002.


Popsicle toes

-- (lars@indy.net), May 21, 2002.

world's sexiest pump

-- just for JBT (cin@cin.cin), May 21, 2002.


From boobs to heels to boobs...

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for my wife." "What type of bra?" asked the clerk. "Type?" inquires the man, "There is more than one type?"

"Look around," said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color and material imaginable. "Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from." Relieved, the man asked about the types.

The saleslady replied "There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types. Which one would you prefer?" Now befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them.

The saleslady responded, "It is all really quite simple...

The Catholic type supports the masses.

The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen,

The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright,

and the Baptist makes mountains out of mole hills."

-- (WhatReligion@your.bra), May 22, 2002.


Don't forget these bras...

The Jewish bra requires you to deposit money to open it

The Muslim bra makes the boobs disappear

The Buddhist bra makes you more conscious of your boobs

-- (different strokes @ different. folks), May 22, 2002.


Let's face it, the male ego is such that flattery goes quite a long way. I speak from personal experience.

-- Peter Errington (petere7@starpower.net), May 22, 2002.

"sit and look at your toes" I think of all the body parts, feet are the worst looking. They are an engineering marvel, designed to move our weight around but uuuuuuglllllly. Even the prettiest models' feet are ugly; no amount of nail polish can help. But on the other hand, hands are very beautiful. I usually study a person's hands, especially a child's. Ok I know, weird huh?

-- Maria (anon@ymous.com), May 22, 2002.

Beauty IS in the eye of the beholder. I've always thought my toes were cute. I STILL think so.

-- Anita (Anita_S3@hotmail.com), May 22, 2002.

I'm sure that they are cute Anita. How could your toes be anything else. I'm sorry but I'm not buying the story that the heels that you have in your trunk are your daughters. Are you sure it wasn't something that you picked up for "Hairwash Bob?"? BTW, June 1st is moving day.

To all those that provided more information for this geek (actually its hick Maria) I thank you. Lars, once again you have made me wonder what all exactly is in your favorites folder, Cin your link provided a cornucopia of information on many things besides the infamous "do me heels" (it could take me a while to browse through all the items featured there), Pammy only you would focus on toe cleavage.

Getting back to the subject of the thread, I still think that Nemesis has the right idea in answering what men really want in a woman.

-- Jack Booted Thug (governmentconspiracy@NWO.com), May 22, 2002.


JBT, I didn't come up with that line. "Sensual toe cleavage" was on the shoe site. It just struck me as funny. : ) Since you know WHAT a man wants 'in' a woman, tell me which part of her body he wants it in. ; )

-- Pammy (upstairs@or.downstairs?), May 22, 2002.

Anita,

I'll have to see a picture. Until then, I haughtily reserve judgement. :)

Speaking of which ... are the pictures from the Las Vegas and Myrtle Beach gatherings still online anywhere?

-- Stephen (smpoole7@bellsouth.net), May 23, 2002.


Men want a woman who gives head AND swallows

Everyday

Just admit it okay

-- gargle and swallow (Sleazy__Sally@hotmail.com), May 24, 2002.


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