From a piece of spam I just got:

"STOP Investing the Same Old Ways!!! .....NOW is the Time to Embrace the ENERGY Markets!"

-- Peter Errington (petere7@starpower.net), February 22, 2002

Answers

Heh.

Yeah, that's not bad.

I told Sandy the other day that we ought to buy a ton of stock called "ENRON."

I mean, it IS real cheap right now ...

-- Stephen M. Poole (smpoole7@bellsouth.net), February 22, 2002.

No! No! No! I said I wanted Good Humor, with lots of sprinkles.

-- Little Nipper (canis@minor.net), February 25, 2002.

LN,

Yeah, but I'll bet YOU didn't know that Good Humor *invented* ice cream on a stick!!!!

Didja?

-- Stephen M. Poole (smpoole7@bellsouth.net), February 25, 2002.

For all the fuss they make about it, you'd think Good Humor invented both ice cream and sticks, instead of just cramming one up the other.

-- Little Nipper (canis@minor.net), February 25, 2002.

Speaking of pioneering in the field of ice cream: Who gave us the following bouncy number, "I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream"?

-- Peter Errington (petere7@starpower.net), February 25, 2002.

Is the answer -- Tomas de Torquemanda?

-- E.H.Porter (just.wondering@about.it), February 25, 2002.

E.H., good guess, but no cigaro. Try a little later.

-- Peter Errington (petere7@starpower.net), February 25, 2002.

Johnson, Moll, and King

Recipe for E-Z Ice Cream

Kids ages 2 to 102 can make this ice cream with little muss or fuss - - and it's delicious! You don't need an ice cream machine, and you don't need a freezer for hardening or storage, so you can make this recipe on camping trips, at parties, school, the beach - - just about anywhere!

You will need:

1 cup heavy whipping cream

1 tablespoon sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

2 cups ice cubes (about two large handsful) 6 tablespoons rock salt

1 Ziploc brand sandwich bag, or other sandwich-size plastic sealable bag

1 Ziploc brand freezer bag (quart-sized), or other large, plastic sealable freezer bag

1 pair of oven mitts

1 dishtowel

1 spoon

Step one: Pour the cream into the sandwich-sized bag.

Step two: Add sugar and vanilla extract to the same bag.

Step three: Seal the bag. (Make sure it's tightly closed, otherwise your ingredients will leak.)

Step four: Place the closed sandwich bag inside the freezer bag.

Step five: Pour the ice into the freezer bag.

Step six: Pour the rock salt into the freezer bag.

Step seven: Seal the freezer bag. Tightly, please!

Step eight: Put on your oven mitts; or wrap the dishtowel loosely around the freezer bag.

Step nine: Shake, rock, roll, and squeeze the bag for a full 5 minutes. (Note: the bag is going to get very cold, between 18-20 degrees F. The mitts or dishtowel will keep your hands from freezing.)

Step ten: Open the freezer bag and remove the sandwich bag. Using the dish towel, quickly wipe away any rock salt and water from the outside of the sandwich bag. (The ice will have almost completely melted, so the outside of your sandwich bag will be wet.) This will keep the salt and water out of your sandwich bag - - and your ice cream! -- when you open it.

Step eleven: Open the sandwich bag and . . . enjoy! You may eat the ice cream right out of the bag, or spoon it into a bowl. To remove every last delicious bit of the ice cream, turn the bag inside out and scrape the sides with your spoon.

Makes 1 serving.

Serving suggestions: Try drizzling chocolate sauce or other syrups atop your ice cream... sprinkling chocolate chips, jimmies, M & Ms, granola or nuts over it... or mixing it with fresh strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, or peaches.

-- (cin@cin.cin), February 25, 2002.

Cin, I think the Johnson listed as an author was Howard. Anyway, that song, or at least a shortened version of it, became the Howard Johnson theme song.

"Tuesday, Monday, we all want a sundae." You better believe it.

-- Peter Errington (petere7@starpower.net), February 25, 2002.

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream (lyrics)

-- (Roland@hatemail.com), February 25, 2002.

You call that "little muss or fuss"?

LOL, I call that a recipe for a major kitchen disaster!

-- (no.doubt@huge.sticky.mess), February 26, 2002.