Equate

Diaper

Relief

Ointment

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeeD@yahoo.com), December 14, 2001

Answers

That's kind of 'rash' isn't it Deedah?

(snicker)

Chasin' my tail...

The Dog

-- The Dog (dogdesert@hotmail.com), December 14, 2001.

Gaulded eh?

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), December 14, 2001.

Oh yes

-- (Algernon C. Braithewait@Cambridge.MA), December 14, 2001.

This must have a point.

Best Wishes,,,,,

Z

-- Z1X4Y7 (Z1X4Y7@aol.com), December 14, 2001.

Better go easy on that Cheese Whiz Unk. It is full of chemicals and really does a number on your brain.

-- seeker (searchin@high.and.low), December 14, 2001.

On second thought; are you THE Dennis. ;o)))

Best Wishes,,,,

Z

-- Z1X4Y7 (Z1X4Y7@aol.com), December 14, 2001.

Does a number on my brain?

Two words for you seeker,

monkey

butt

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeeD@yahoo.com), December 14, 2001.

I just love a man in diapers. NOT!

-- Pammy (thanks@for.sharing ; )), December 14, 2001.

Crotch rot? You need to find some Lucky Tiger Ointment. It will clear things right up.

Not that I've ever had to use it.

-- Jack Booted Thug (governmentconspiracy@NWO.com), December 14, 2001.

Oh yeah?!

Well, your Momma wears army boots.

-- seeker (searchin@low.and.high), December 14, 2001.

Ever see that MadTV skit character Michael in the baseball cap:

I..I...I don't get it!

What part don't you get, Michael?

AAAAALLLLLL OOFFFFF IIIIITTTTTTT!!!!!!!!

heehee love that show

-- (cin@cin.cin), December 14, 2001.

Three words:

Balsam of Peru

-- Aunt Bee (Aunt__Bee@hotmail.com), December 14, 2001.

Does this have anything to do with brussels sprouts??

-- Ouch! (just an@anonymous.one), December 15, 2001.

seeker,

Monkey butt is not an insult, it is a terrible affliction common in sub-tropical climes in people who walk and sweat a lot.

( * )

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeeD@yahoo.com), December 15, 2001.

Nudity helps, Unk.

-- helen begins fasting and prayer for unk's sake (reversing@rot.in.america), December 15, 2001.

Whoa, Helen! What happened to the blue hair? ; )

Unk, please get well before February 2nd. How embarrassing! lol (You've got mail!)

-- Pammy (pamela_sue57@hotmail.com), December 15, 2001.

What's happening Feb 2nd?

-- (just@wondrin.), December 15, 2001.

Groundhog's Day. Afraid Unk won't see his shadow if he is unable too appear in the nude due to an "afflication common in sub-tropical climes in people who walk and sweat a lot".

It could be worse Unk. You could live in a near arctic climate like some of us and be waiting for broken butt, an afflication common to those who try to walk on icy surfaces while abnormally high, bitterly cold winds alternately freeze your very soul or knock you off your feet.

-- Jack Booted Thug (governmentconspiracy@NWO.com), December 15, 2001.

Unk, try this, take some baking soda and put it in a little thin cloth sack, like tobacco used to come in ( if ya have to make one), it does need to be fairly thin, fill the bag about a third full, tie it up and put in your front pocket(s).This is a derivitive of an old prevention measure from back in the country.

They used to be able to buy the raw ingredient from the pharmacy,I forget what that was, it came in rock form, but I was told that this is the next best thing as it draws the moisture away from your skin.

There is also a spray called New Skin, though I have never used it.

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), December 15, 2001.

If you've been taking antibiotics, say for surgery or something, this will contribute to a fungal yeast thingy. Your doctor should have something to fix ya right up. Lay off the sugar and take acidophilus.

-- (quack@quack.quack), December 15, 2001.

ps Benedryl

-- (quack@quack.quack), December 15, 2001.

Jesus Cap, why wouldn't you just use one of those little bags of silica that come with new television sets or any other electronic device. Your thinking of a type of dessicant(sp) and I don't think putting it in your pocket would help, unless of course Unk's condition is so bad that he is hanging loose for a while. As I recall, manufacturer's tie the dessicant bags to the device they want to protect.....

I'll let Pammy take it from here.

-- Jack Booted Thug (governmentconspiracy@NWO.com), December 15, 2001.

JBT,

Silica is a skin irritant, those little sacks usually have warnings on'em.

I get that shit bad too and I'm here to tell ya, if carrying around lil sacks of baking soda even diminishes it a bit, it IS worth it.If it worked for my papau and the folks back then, why is it so wacky?

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), December 15, 2001.

Cap,

My post was a little unclear (surprise, surprise)

When I first read your post my immediate thought was of the silica bags which is something that I would not want near any part of my body as silica is as you state highly irritating. My second thought was of how they tie the little bags to the device, thus my poor attempt at humor.

Your home remedy probably has merit. And as we all know, if you are striken with a particularly virulant bout of rashing, anything that will help is a good idea. My money is still on the Lucky Tiger Ointment which my Dad shared with me. Aren't these father/son traditions wonderful. I'm not sure that you can buy this stuff anymore, but it was truly effective. I think it had a sulpher base as it did have an odor like sulpher but it would cure most any rash in one day, two at the most. Probably it worked by burning off the top layer of skin, who knows.

Carlos needs to step in and give his opinion here. I'm sure he has seen or heard of many diffferent remedies.

-- Jack Booted Thug (governmentconspiracy@NWO.com), December 15, 2001.

I've got two little "bags" of Silica Gel [Do not eat-throw away dessicant] from the pocketbook I purchased for Lucky in my brother's name. Might I make some money off these little packs if I offer them on E-Bay as a solution to "monkey butt?"

Heh. I could ALSO make little packets of baking soda, ya know. I could even stitch them between the legs of "Tickle me Elmo".

-- Anita (Anita_S3@hotmail.com), December 15, 2001.

Speaking of monkey butt...

I watched this movie on ppv lastnight called "Animal". It's completely stupid but funny goofy. Unk I think you'd really get a kick out of it, heehee.

-- (cin@cin.cin), December 15, 2001.

Dr Doolittle 2 is good too =O)

-- (cin@cin.cin), December 15, 2001.

lol @ JBT!

I think Helen has the only true remedy. ; )

Forget groundhogs, Pammy is heading to Florida in February!

-- Pammy (pamela_sue57@hotmail.com), December 15, 2001.

JBT,

Not a poor attempt at humor but a defeciency in my humor sensing skills, they musta took a vacation today, solly.In hindsight IGI ; )

I remember once being so ate up with being gaulded I wrapped cold bandana's around my bag while still on the job, needless to say I wasn't the most productive one that day.But boy was it relieving, I was never so glad to have brought my cooler with ice and as allways more than a few bandana's.

Hell, I've even gotten it while working inside in the AC....it's a scourge I say and a miserable one at that.

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), December 15, 2001.

Family vacation, Pammy? Are you gonna get to meet Unk finally?

-- (cin@cin.cin), December 15, 2001.

It's a yeast infection. Caused by any number of things, an imbalance of natural bacteria due to taking antibiotics, wearing tight and/or wet cloths which hold in heat and moisture. Or from a female partner who has gotten a yeast infection from antibiotics, wearing tight and/or wet cloths, or douching away the natural bacteria in her vagina.

Eat yogurt.

You should wash with a mild soap, dry, and coat the affected area with plain (not vanilla) yogurt two or three times a day.

Okay, Okay, you don't like the yogurt idea, it works, but there are more conventional methods of treatment these days. You should be aware that it is passed back and forth between sexual partners, so both should receive treatment and avoid sex until it is eliminated.

Go to the drug store and get gynalotramin or some other yeast infection medication that is sold for women. Ignore the instructions for "inserting" the medication since you do not have a vagina (as far as I know) unless you are effected in your nether region, in which case a plastic glove or saran wrap around your fingers can be used to insert a small amount to get rid of it there.

Or have your wife go to her doctor and get tested for a yeast infection and then you can use some of her medication.

Look in the pharmacy for yeast infection medication with terconazole.

Babies also suffer from this problem (diaper rash that will not go away) in hot climates or when they are bundled up too warmly when , so look in the infant department for medication specifically made for a yeast problem.

After washing and patting dry, lay back with a heat lamp directed at the affected area for while. (A regular lamp will work in a pinch.

I'm not sure, but I think there is a "baby" powder that is medicated which helps keep you dry and prevent it from reacurring.

But still eat yogurt, it supplies the natural bacteria that prevent yeast infections. Yeast is a naturally occurrence, but if it gets out of control you get yeast infections.

Don't wear tight pants and change out of wet bathing suits and clothes that can hold in heat and moisture. Wear cotton underwear.

When you are all better you can get a hot wax treatment to remove pubic hair which helps hold in moisture. (ROFLMAO-last one was a joke son.....)

-- Cherri (jessam5@home.com), December 17, 2001.

There you go Unk. Break out the sun lamp and keep your hands off the missus!

-- Jack Booted Thug (governmentconspiracy@NWO.com), December 17, 2001.

Monkey butt is NOT a yeast thingy. It is a red sore bum from chafing and sweating, sheesh, yeast.

Equate

Diaper

Relief

Ointment

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeeD@yahoo.com), December 17, 2001.

Participation in a conversation this ... detailed ... is forbidden by my clan unless it occurs among close relatives. Therefore, you are all forcibly adopted as of today.

-- helen -- you may call me mother (like@it.or.not), December 17, 2001.

Awe Unk your first yeast infection

-- (congratulations@!.), December 17, 2001.

When you are all better you can get a hot wax treatment to remove pubic hair which helps hold in moisture.

I don't think so. I heard about a guy who got his ass waxed. When the lady ripped the wax-paper-thingy-stuff off, his testicles, his anus, and two feet of his lower intestine came off with it!

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeeD@yahoo.com), December 17, 2001.

Unk, you can call it whatever you want to, it is still an over abundance of yeast caused by moisture and warmth.

Geeze, don't think a yeast infection isn't the clap.

But then, strong men don't get women's maladies. And the symptoms scream of an imbalance of natural bacteria, yeast is agressive (just look at bread riasing) and will move in and take over if you your area is in the least bit raw.

We are adults here and can talk of these formally unspeakable subjects. I hope you don't still think you will go insane, grow hair on your palms if you masterbate....

At least look into the possibility of it being caused by yeast, better than just sitting and suffering in silence (well you did ask, so not too silent)

I hear that hot wax treatment has been known to perform apendectomies. (spelling bad-tired)

-- Cherri (jessam5@home.com), December 18, 2001.

Maybe it's Athlete's butt. I'm pretty sure that Athlete's feet are caused by an abundance of moisture, etc. Just walk around nekkid whenever you can. Find a nude beach and lay in the sun. Air, sun, and water are good cures for derma ailments. [There's got to be a song here somewhere.]

-- Anita (Anita_S3@hotmail.com), December 18, 2001.

Jock Itch

What is it?

Jock itch is a fungal infection of the groin and upper thighs. Lesions caused by jock itch can extend from the crease between the inner thigh and pelvis, over the adjacent upper inner thigh, and into the anal area.

* The penis and scrotum are seldom affected

* Lesions usually appear as a rash with defined, elevated edges

* Symptoms include itching, chafing and burning

How do I get rid of it?

Wash and dry the infected area

Apply a thin layer of Tinactin® Jock Itch Cream twice a day (morning and night) or as directed by your doctor

If infection covers a large area, try Tinactin® Jock Itch Powder Spray

Continue treatment for two weeks, even if symptoms disappear, to ensure a complete cure

If condition persists, consult your doctor

............

A close friend of mine suffered something awful from this condition...Tinactin was the only thing that worked for him.

-- (;) @in.t saying), December 18, 2001.

Holy crap. Equate solved it in one day, all gone now, thus my public praise of their product.

The next thing you yeasters will accuse me of having is cock cheese!

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeeD@yahoo.com), December 18, 2001.

WHICH I DON'T HAVE!!!

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeeD@yahoo.com), December 18, 2001.

Heh. I thought Equate was that nutritional drink that I buy for Lucky.

-- Anita (Anita_S3@hotmail.com), December 18, 2001.

Deedah, we always thought you were a little cheesy anyway... (snicker)

Scratchin' an itch... (but not there)

The Dog

-- The Dog (dogdesert@hotmail.com), December 18, 2001.

cock cheese???? That only happens to men who are not circumcized right?

-- Cherri (jessam5@home.com), December 18, 2001.

Right

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeeD@yahoo.com), December 18, 2001.

Pammy gags and spits out her cottage cheese and peaches. ; )

-- Pammy (eewww@gross.Unk!), December 18, 2001.

*bjork* wth

-- (cin@cin.cin), December 18, 2001.

Now that I've adopted all of you, you are grounded.

-- mother helen (get@used.to.it), December 18, 2001.