Confessions of a chocoholicgreenspun.com : LUSENET : ACountryPlace : One Thread
Someone sent this to me. This is me folks! I have a Milky way dark in my purse right now. This is definitely a woman's addiction. There is something in chocolate that calms women down. My sister can be really wild around that time of the month, and if she doesn't do it her husband forces her to eat a candy bar. Take note husbands of PMSing women.
Confessions of a Chocoholic....
Can I be brutally honest here? I love chocolate. Boy, do I love chocolate.
There are particular moments in life where nothing will do but a Kit Kat bar.
And I know I have plenty of company--thighs don't lie. We are chocoholics, we know it and yet there is no 12 step program to help us with our powerlessness over chocolate.
We are a secret sisterhood that delights in the smooth texture and delightful flavor of chocolate. A perfect piece of chocolate is cause for celebration; a well-orchestrated chocolate dessert--pure rapture.
But look here: there are Rules of Chocolate, so if anyone in your house is a chocoholic, you'd best learn these quick. Your life could depend on it:
1. To err is human--but if you mess with my chocolate, you're history 2. Chocolate flavored chocolate is an abomination. Give us only the Real Thing. 3. If it's imported, in a gold box and cost half your paycheck, we will follow you anywhere. 4. National Chocolate Day--could be as frequently as once a month in your house. Be prepared. 5. Hershey Kisses, human kisses--if you're sensitive, don't ask which ones we like better.
If it were possible to have chocolate coursing through my veins and live, I might give it a try. No question about it: I am a mainliner. My daughter has emerged in her own right, right out of the chocolate gene pool, to claim her own spot in this accursed sisterhood. It seriously frightens me. If I have eaten chocolate within the last week, she'll smell it on my breath. "Aha!" she'll exclaim. "Where is it?" No one within earshot knows what "it" could possibly mean, unless of course, they are one of Us. Like pod people from the movie, "Invasion of the Body Snatchers", we know right away what "it" is. " It," refers to the stash of Snickers bars hidden in the attic behind the Christmas decorations.
There is rather large incongruity to the fact that my children snack on rice crackers and carrot sticks while there is chocolate in my desk drawer. But I have paid the price for such sin as the chocolate has taken up residence in my backside. I can no longer pretend to be interested in fat grams and fiber counts when the chocolate has betrayed me so obviously. In a restaurant, when I order a salad, the waiter scoffs, "Oh, come on now! Why don't you just order the chocolate cheesecake?" There are no secrets when it comes to chocolate, you know.
Chocolate soothes the savage beast as any confirmed chocoholic will tell you and now even the medical community is finally getting (ahem) behind us. Apparently, the good stuff in chocolate (catechins--a wonderful phytochemical, among others--see Judy's column) even surpasses that of green tea, the newest anti-cancer promoting agent. Rejoice! Now we have a legitimate excuse for excess--we're merely trying to give our immune systems a boost! Anyone remotely aware of the latest in health news will understand that gigantic bag of M & M's in the front seat of your car is all in the name of good health.
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men... Colossians 3:23
"Any concern too small to be turned into a prayer is too small to be made into a burden." Corrie Ten Boom
Little Bit Farm
-- Little Bit farm (littleBit@farm.com), November 02, 2001
If I hide my chocolate under the veggies in the bottom of the refridgerator, my family never finds it!
-- Laura (LadybugWrangler@hotmail.com), November 03, 2001.
Alright, you caught me! haha, but the Snickers are almost gone;)
-- mary (firstname.lastname@example.org), November 03, 2001.
I refuse to confess on the grounds that I may incriminate myself for swiping treats from my family's stashes. But my husband is WORST in this house for sure.
-- Alison in N.S. (email@example.com), November 09, 2001.
I'm reading this, as I'm munching on Nestle's semi-sweet morsels. You know, thekinds you put in choky chipcookies, that melt just right, mmm!!!!!!!!
-- Cindy (S.E.IN) (firstname.lastname@example.org), November 21, 2001.