Hmmmm...

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Actress Anne Heche said in an ABC interview to be aired Wednesday that sexual abuse by her father until she was 12 drove her ``insane,'' leading her to hear what she believed was God speaking in a special language.

The 32-year-old Heche, who married cameraman Coleman Laffoon over the weekend, told ABC's ``20/20'' she developed a split personality to deal with the abuse and did not recover until after a mental breakdown last year in Fresno, California, following her split from her lover, comedian Ellen DeGeneres.

``I had a fantasy world that I escaped to,'' Heche said in the interview with Barbara Walters. ``I called my other personality Celestia. ... I believed I was from another planet. I think I was insane.''

Heche, told Walters that her father, Don, a church choir director who died of AIDS (news - web sites) in 1983, abused her sexually from the time she was a toddler until she was 12. ``My father would always undress in front of me, beckon me to bed as if I was his lover,'' Heche said.

``I remember entering the bed with him many times. I went through fighting to get him off me. I went through screaming for my mother. I went through a terror of thinking I was going to die. I went through thoughts of wanting to die.''

Heche, who stars with Denzel Washington in the upcoming film ``John Q,'' said she also thought she was going to die when she learned her father was suffering from AIDS. ``I did a lot of things in my life to get away from what had happened to me,'' she said. ``I drank, I smoked, I did drugs, I had sex. ... I did anything I could to get the shame out of my life.''

QUEST FOR PARENTS' LOVE

``I think everything I've done in all my insanity was trying to get my parents to love me,'' Heche said. ``My father loved movie stars. I decided I needed to become famous to get his love. My mother loves Jesus, so I wanted to become Jesus Christ. I wanted to save the world to get her love.''

The actress said she first suffered from a split personality when, after seven years of therapy, she phoned her mother to discuss the abuse and her mother hung up. ``And in that moment I think I split off from myself,'' she said.

``Anne, this girl who had just confronted her mother, shrunk and out came Celestia, where I was literally thrown to the ground ... and heard the voice of God. I thought I was absolutely insane. ... I was existing as two people.''

``I spoke a different language that God and I spoke together,'' Heche said. ``I could see into the future. I could heal people. I did (the 1997 film) 'Wag the Dog.' I was meeting the most incredible actors of my life. ... And then I would go into my trailer and have to write down messages that I -- I believed I was hearing from God about love.''

Heche said she had never been with a woman before when she met DeGeneres in 1997 at an Oscar party and fell in love.

Heche and DeGeneres quickly became the country's highest-profile lesbian couple, but they broke up three years later.

Speaking about her split last year with DeGeneres, Heche said the couple's problems started during a ``difficult time'' for the comedian, whose television series, the first prime-time network show whose lead character was openly gay, had been canceled.

``We had gotten to the point where we were not happy,'' Heche said. ``We had become isolated from the world together. I am a person who loves people, who loves being in the world, who loves acting. All of these things that I didn't have, and I wanted them back. And I believe that threatened her.''

After their breakup, Heche was found wandering near a farmhouse in Fresno, apparently confused and distraught.

Heche said she had now recovered from her mental illness.

-- (news@to.me), September 04, 2001

Answers

I give her a lot of credit for being so forthright and doing the necessary soul-searching to rise above her difficulties but I suspect she's still a tad daffy but in an entirely different way.

-- At (The@Sidelines.com), September 04, 2001.

But did the abuse make her a star fucker?

-- Enquiring (minds@want.know), September 04, 2001.

So, does this mean she won't be bumpin' donuts any more with Miss Ellen?

Well, now that she's got her shit together, maybe we should ask her for some insightful political commentary. Bein a Hollywood actor/actress/whatthefuckever, she is no doubt emminently qualified.

Dan V.

-- Jimmy Splinters (jsplinters@earthlink.net), September 05, 2001.

I read recently where she got married.

I know I got my problems but I know what planet I'm on.

Venus, um, right? :-)

-- sumer (I@aint.sayin), September 05, 2001.