lonely man seeks lover or pen pal

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hi, my name is ian turton. i'm a lonely refugee from england and i'm 3000 miles away from my family. i had a girlfriend once, but she dumped me because she said i was too much of a wimp. i've tried personal ads to no avail, and i had a date with a hot cousin babe at the family reunion in brussels, but i can't afford the plane fare.

so i guess i'm stuck here in my rat infested apartment in new york, without plane fare to meet my sexy cousin. so maybe one of you fine new york girls would like to meet me? or maybe someone can send me $1200 plane fare? my address is

1725 york avenue apartment 30A new york, NY 10128

if you want to be my pen pal or my phone pal my number is 212-348-9841. no niggers, please. i can't stand niggers.

thanks!

(ian)

-- (remailer@xganon.com), June 30, 2001

Answers

Ha!Ha!Ha!... Ha!Ha!Ha!... Ha!Ha!Ha!... gawd!

-- Hey Buddy (youronthe@fastrack.com), June 30, 2001.

You sound like a typical redneck Repugliscum, the incest was a dead giveaway.

Florida isn't far away, I hear Catherine Heiress will sleep with anyone. How about Kenny Starr, he's available. He likes to take it up the ass.

-- (Duuhbya's daughters @ are. easy too), June 30, 2001.


Thanks for the address, we're on our way over to make you into our bitch.

-- Niggahs With Attitudes (british wimps @ make. good bitches), June 30, 2001.

Just in case:

Most people will quickly recognize this as a hoax, designed by an enemy of Ian Turton, in the hope it will draw a lot of angry people down on an innocent man's head. Don't fall for it.

-- Little Nipper (canis@minor.net), June 30, 2001.


here he is, if you see this man, kill him

-- Joe Nigger (can't @ stand. rednecks), June 30, 2001.


Can you find a pic of his cuz?

-- Lars (larsguy@yahoo.com), June 30, 2001.

I don't know what this means, but I did find an interesting reference to Ian Turton.

http://www.livejournal.com/users/unknownj/day/2001/02/06

Tuesday, February 6th, 2001

11:17a - Oh, not to mention...

Spent a lot of last night Trolling. Not newsgroups, just people...

Victim 1: Adam Potts

Using my superior powers of flaming, I was able to reduce this child to a gibbering wreck, and destroy his soul forever. Using a combination of disgusting and vicious attacks on his sanity, I managed to make him flee forever. Hooray

Victim 2: Some bird my brother knows

Somehow my brother (using a carefully plotted "This person is like Ian Turton" wind-up) managed to make me also start trolling somebody else, asking "am i in ur klass?" amongst other questions, before the individual turned hostile, and had to be subdued with flames...

Victim 3: Some friend of Mike Beech

Somebody was using Mike's account on MSN, and said "hi i'm mikes girlfriend who r u?". Naturally I responded "I'm Mike's other girlfriend, who crack-whore, and I'm here to kill you". Wound them up for ages...

How is it that so few other people see or appreciate the wonderful art form that is trolling? :o)

-- (stop@the.trolling), June 30, 2001.


OK, here is the original for this thread. Copied from Google groups-soc-penpals

Ian Turton

-- (angular_man_@_Salvador.Dali), June 30, 2001.


LOL Lars. You certainly know how to cut right to the important issues.

Yes indeed, Purgatory is too good for you.

-- Jack Booted Thug (governmetnconspiracy@NWO.com), July 01, 2001.


ALL MESSAGES AFTER THIS ONE SUBJECT TO THE LOVE DECREE!

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeed@yahoo.com), July 01, 2001.


I love you Ian.

-- (nemesis@awol.com), July 01, 2001.

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