just a bit of humor

greenspun.com : LUSENET : Countryside : One Thread

(borrowed from bwhmag email by oliver del signore)


What is the speed of dark? And what i want to know, what if you are cruising along in your spaceship at the speed of light in the dark, what happens when you turn on your headlights?

Why are there Braille signs on drive-up ATM's?

How come you never hear about gruntled employees?

Why do we say "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?

If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

How can there be self-help groups?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

What became of Preparations A through G?

If knees were backwards, what would chairs look like?

When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?

Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

Hermits have no peer pressure.

Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.

Did Washington just flash a quarter for his ID?

If the room is below freezing, is it still room temperature?

-- gene ward (gward34847@aol.com), June 07, 2001


Gene, there are 12,349 comedians out of work,, do you want to guess why?

-- mitch hearn (moopups1@aol.com), June 07, 2001.

Just one more:

If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

-- Cathy N. (keeper8@attcanada.ca), June 08, 2001.

Gene, I liked the one about the free gift. I always wonder why people say "the biggest majortiy." Isn't the majority always the biggest? Eagle

-- eagle (eagle@alpha1.net), June 08, 2001.

Thanks for the laugh Gene!

Have a great day!!

-- michelle (tsjheath@nci2.net), June 08, 2001.

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