are YOU henpcked

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Here is coppy/paste job re: henpecked. Thought it was funny.

1. He wears the pants in the house – under his apron.

2. He has two chances of winning an argument with her, slim and none.

3. She leads a double life – hers and his.

4. He comes right out and says what she tells him to think.

5. She does not have to raise the roof, all she has to do is raise an eyebrow.

6. The only time he opens his mouth is to ask her for the apron and the vacuum cleaner.

7. He always has the last word – he says, “I apologize”.

8. She snaps “are you a man or a mouse – squeak up”.

9. He was a man about town, she has turned him into a mouse around the house.

10. The last big decision she let him make was whether to wash or to dry.

11. She tames to be pleased.

12. He put a ring on her finger and she put one through his nose.

13. He can’t even open his mouth to yawn, she complains he is causing a draft.

14. He was a dude before marriage – now he is subdued.

15. He married her for his looks, but not the kind he’s getting now.

16. He even has to ask permission to ask permission.

17. She lost her thumb in an accident and sued for $100,000, because it was the thumb she had him under.

18. She even complains about the noise he makes, when he is fixing his own breakfast.

19. He worships the ground she gives him the run – around on.

20. He goes to a woman dentist – it’s a relief to be told to open his mouth instead of to shut it.

21. When he is late for dinner he gets two kinds of meat, ‘hot tongue’ & ‘cold shoulder’.

22. He should have been warned, when he carried her over the threshold after they were married, that she couldn’t wait to put her foot down.

23. Every once in awhile she comes to him on her bended knees. She dares him to come out from under the bed.

24. He has to hold his pay envelope up to the light, to see if he got a raise.

25. She wants to go to the seashore, claiming that mountain air disagrees with her. He can’t see how it would dare.

By.L.Safian

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-- sumer (shh@aol.con), March 04, 2001

Answers

Why do I picture a really fat woman and an anorexic looking man???

LOL!

-- Peg (pegmcleod@mediaone.net), March 04, 2001.


Peg: ROFL, actually I was thinking bout my son and his girlfriend. :-)

I'm sooooo bad :-) but honest. And the pic would fit as well.

-- sumer (shh@aol.con), March 05, 2001.


Ah! This takes me back to an earlier and simpler time - when spousal abuse was a source of entertainment!

-- Little Nipper (canis@minor.net), March 05, 2001.

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