Joke (PG-13) : LUSENET : Countryside : One Thread

The Lone Ranger and Tonto are camping in the desert, set up their tent, and are both asleep. Some hours later, The Lone Ranger wakes his faithful friend. "Tonto, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

Tonto replies, "Me see millions of stars." "What does that tell you?" ask The Lone Ranger.

Tonto ponders for a minute. "Astronomically speaking", it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.

"Astrologically", it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.

"Time wise", it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.

"Theologically", it's evident the Lord is all powerful and we are small and insignificant.

"Meteorologically", it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.

"What it tell you, Kemo Sabi?"

The Lone Ranger is silent for a moment, then speaks.

"Tonto, you Dumb Ass, someone has stolen our tent!

-- Kenneth in N.C. (, January 23, 2001


Kenneth, Good one. Tonto and the Lone Ranger are surrounded by the warriors of the combined Western Nations. The Lone Ranger says "Well old freind, we have fought outlaws and desparados together side by side for many years, now it looks like we are going to die the side by side at the hands of these warriors." Tonto replies "Where you get this "we" from white man, you got a mouse in your pocket?".

-- Jay Blair in N. AL (, January 23, 2001.

Jay, I can't tell you how many times my husband has asked me "if I have a mouse in my pocket" when I use the royal we! He also accuses me of speaking french oui oui (pronounced we we). Kim

-- kim (, January 23, 2001.

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