But what would Freud say?

A LIL' METAMUCIL ABUSE'LL THRILL YA

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Constipation Is Not the Root of All Evil After All

NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - People who gauge their health by their bowel movements may be using a long-outdated yardstick. Over the last few centuries, reports of the ill-effects of constipation have been greatly exaggerated, according to a report in the December 23/30 issue of the British Medical Journal.

Although today's medical experts do not consider constipation the root of all evil, as doctors once did, many people still cling to the idea that a daily bowel movement is vital to good health. According to Dr. James Wharton of the University of Washington School of Medicine in Seattle, constipation's bad reputation has been tough to eliminate from Western society.

While some people suffer chronic constipation that requires diet and lifestyle changes, far more often the condition is occasional. And while it may be unpleasant, constipation does not trigger a build-up of toxins in the body, Wharton writes.

But until about the middle of the 20th century, many doctors and the public believed that a daily bowel movement was vital to clearing the body of disease-causing "foulness". Consumers were bombarded by claims of laxatives, enema equipment, rectal dilators and abdominal support belts that promised a good "cleaning out".

By the 19th century, Wharton explains, there was even medical consensus that constipation was the "foremost disease of civilisation, a universal affliction in industrialized societies that engendered the full range of more serious human ailments". It was known as "autointoxication"--poisoning oneself by failing to relieve oneself.

While modern science has certainly toned down this constipation hysteria, it has also put much faith in the idea that the high-fiber diets that battle constipation may prevent colon cancer as well. Recent studies, however, have suggested fiber may engender no such benefit, Wharton notes.

Despite this history of overreaction to constipation, certain age-old recommendations for treating the condition are still good ideas: eating more fiber-rich fruits, vegetables and whole grains; regular exercise; and answering when nature calls for a bowel movement. However, according to Wharton, people have historically felt these measures "require more self discipline and sacrifice than they cared to exercise".

SOURCE: British Medical Journal 2000;321:1586-1589.

-- Lars (larsguy@yahoo.com), December 28, 2000

Answers

Larsguy = anal retentive guy

-- (who_let_the_dogs_out@who.who), December 28, 2000.

"many people still cling to the idea that a daily bowel movement is vital to good health."

Dude, it's what wakes me up in the morning and it's not the "idea" of it either!

Deano

-- Deano (deano@luvthebeach.com), December 28, 2000.

LOL-had a hard time getting past "constipation's bad reputation has been tough to eliminate...". Those brits are a humorous lot!!

-- Aunt Bee (Aunt__Bee@hotmail.com), December 28, 2000.

Consumers were bombarded by claims of laxatives, enema equipment, rectal dilators and abdominal support belts that promised a good "cleaning out".

Rectal dilators? Seriously? Oh man!

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeed@yahoo.com), December 28, 2000.

Would they be like.....oh, right-angle salad servers that you stick up your butt? Holy shit, I cannot fathom what the ads for that contraption must have looked like.

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeed@yahoo.com), December 28, 2000.

Just for you Unc

Anal Dilators

-- (Director_of_Research@Anal.Industries), December 29, 2000.

Are batteries included?

-- I'm Here, I'm There, (I'm Everywhere,@So.Beware), December 29, 2000.

Seems like I saw these in the Xandria Catalog, only they were flesh and neon colored and called "butt plugs."

-- (kb8um8@yahoo.com), December 29, 2000.

I must be dull cause I don't get it. If you are constipated, how does ramming a butt-plug up your ass help? Seems to me that it would only make things worse, since now your turd has a concave end.

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeed@yahoo.com), December 29, 2000.

I've found a much better solution for constipation relief. Rather than using a butt-plug, try this handy tool.

-- Uncle Deedah (unkeed@yahoo.com), December 29, 2000.

This will dig through and come out of your bellybutton.

-- Do I have to? (asad@bdu.div), December 29, 2000.

ROFLMAO. Unc, one scoop or two? "Do I have to", does that have a rotating augur? Where is the motor? Mr Director, what unc said.

-- Lars (larsguy@yahoo.com), December 29, 2000.

Did you hear about the constipated old fart math prof?

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He worked it out with a slide rule.

-- (kb8um8@yahoo.com), December 29, 2000.

(cymbal crash, followed by moans from the audience -- some of whom are probably constipated anyway)

-- (Sound Effects@R.Us), December 30, 2000.

KB -- Dave -- Listen to me. Take next week off. Go shopping. Go ice fishing. Hell, go somewhere warm. You need a break, dude. Badly. When you start dredging up 8th grade jokes, it's TIME.

-- (dis@enfranch.ized), December 30, 2000.

Dis, if you're who I think you are, check your back porch. I left today's newspaper and some groceries in a bag on your toolbox. Hope you're feeling better soon! And if you sneeze on my girlfriend, I will take a dump on your keyboard.

-- (kb8um8@yahoo.com), December 30, 2000.