FOR WOMAN ONLY ------- Re: Mammagrams : LUSENET : TB2K spinoff uncensored : One Thread


Many woman are afraid of their 1st mammogram, but there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceeding the exam and doing the following exercises, you will be totally prepped for the test and best of all, you can do these simple practice exercises right in your home.


Open your frigerator door insert one breast between the door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for 5 seconds repeat again in case the 1st time didnt work.


Enter your garage at 3:00 am when the temp. of the cement floor is just perfect. Strip naked and lie comfortably on the floor w/one breast wedged beneath the rear of your car tire. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is cold and flat. Turn over, do other breast the same.


Freeze your metal bookends overnite. Strip to the waist only. Invite hubby or SO into your room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts and SMASH the bookends together as hard as you and the SO possibly can. Repeat for other breast.


Um, Just a thought for ALL the women out here:

MENtal anguish MENtal illness MENstrual cramps MENtal breakdown MENopause

Ever notice how ALL of women's problems start with men?

Thhhh thhh thhh thats all folks.

And shame on you guyz for peeking.

Have a great weekend.

-- sumer (, November 17, 2000


I think I see why you have been in such a lousy bitchy mood lately. :-)

BTW, which "woman" on this forum is your post addressed to... or is it supposed to be "women"?

-- Magilla Gorilla (beating@my.breasts), November 17, 2000.

Makes me wonder what a prostate examination might entail...

-- Bingo1 (, November 17, 2000.

"5 seconds"?!?!?!! Try FIVE MINUTES (give or take 4-1/2 minutes [g]). And then of course, the DO-OVER because YOU MOVED.

Other than that, a pretty accurate description.


-- Patricia (, November 17, 2000.

Oh pish... Italics off?!?

-- Patricia (, November 17, 2000.

"Ever notice how ALL of women's problems start with men?"

Although we can't seem to be happy without ya, remember woman can also be pronounced WOE-man.

-- Bachelor (BS@love.ya.ladies), November 18, 2000.


Testicular exams are remarkably similar to breast exams and just as important. 'Course, since I only have the one now, it doesn't take nearly so long!

-- Tarzan the Ape Man (tarzan@swingingthroughthejunglewithouta.nut), November 18, 2000.


Whoops! I just re-read your post and realized you were talking about the prostate.

-- Tarzan the Ape Man (tarzan@swingingthroughthejunglewithouta.nut), November 18, 2000.

Tarz: your 'humor', you go dude.

-- (, November 20, 2000.

{ Note to Will: Is your mom doing OK? }


-- flora (***@__._), November 20, 2000.

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