27 Things Real Men Would Never Say

1. I think Barry Manilow is one cool Son of a Bitch. 2. No, I don't want another beer. I have to work tomorrow. 3. Her boobs are just too big. 4. Sometimes I just want to be held. 5. I am just too tired to have sex again today! 6. Sure! I'd love to wear a condom. 7. We haven't been to the mall for ages, let's go shopping and I can hold your purse. 8. Screw Monday Night Football, let's watch "Ally McBeal". 9. It's late. Put your clothes back on and I'll take you home. 10. Honey, I'm going to the store, do you need more tampons?? 11. Are you losing weight sweetie?? 12. I'm sick of beer, give me a fruit juice with a lemon twist. 13. Great! Your mother's coming to stay with us again. 14. I wonder if my gorgeous neighbor knows that her drapes are always open when she's getting ready for bed. Maybe I should tell her. 15. No way, you weeded the garden last week. It's my turn. 16. Better get rid of these old Penthouse magazines. I don't look at them anymore. 17. I understand. 18. This movie has way too much nudity. 19. Damn, we're late for church! 20. No! I don't want to see your sister's breasts. 21. Damn these onions, pass me a tissue. 22. Put some panties on for Christ's sake. 23. Eat something!! You are starting to look like a Victoria's Secret Model!! 24. Don't pick that up, I got it. 25. Happy Anniversary!!! 26. Hey, isn't today your mothers birthday?? 27. Let's talk, I miss talking.

-- (EmmaP1616@hotmail.com), November 04, 2000

Answers

Emma:

Learning to format on this board is a little like learning to load film in a Leica. It is a bitch. Once you learn, it makes you feel better than other people. Me , I'm not there either.You have a better excuse than me; you haven't been here for years. :^)

Best wishes,,,,

Z

-- Z1X4Y7 (Z1X4Y7@aol.com), November 04, 2000.

"Learning to format on this board is a little like learning to load film in a Leica. It is a bitch."

Might be a bitch for you, but most of us find it pretty simple... hit enter twice after each line. :-)

-- lol (not@that.hard), November 04, 2000.

LOL:

You haven't been on this board long enough. Sometimes it works: sometimes it doesn't. I remember back in 97; oh well a high school kid like you wouldn't remember that far back. You probably use Windows ME. :^)

Best wishes,,,,,

Z

-- Z1X4Y7 (Z1X4Y7@aol.com), November 04, 2000.

Works every time for me. You don't have to insult me just because you are too dumb to figure it out.

LOL

Best of luck,,,,

-- (Z@not.2brite), November 04, 2000.

1. I think Barry Manilow is one cool Son of a Bitch.

2. No, I don't want another beer. I have to work tomorrow.

3. Her boobs are just too big.

4. Sometimes I just want to be held.

5. I am just too tired to have sex again today!

6. Sure! I'd love to wear a condom.

7. We haven't been to the mall for ages, let's go shopping and I can hold your purse.

8. Screw Monday Night Football, let's watch "Ally McBeal".

9. It's late. Put your clothes back on and I'll take you home.

10. Honey, I'm going to the store, do you need more tampons??

11. Are you losing weight sweetie??

12. I'm sick of beer, give me a fruit juice with a lemon twist.

13. Great! Your mother's coming to stay with us again.

14. I wonder if my gorgeous neighbor knows that her drapes are always open when she's getting ready for bed. Maybe I should tell her.

15. No way, you weeded the garden last week. It's my turn.

16. Better get rid of these old Penthouse magazines. I don't look at them anymore.

17. I understand.

18. This movie has way too much nudity.

19. Damn, we're late for church!

20. No! I don't want to see your sister's breasts.

21. Damn these onions, pass me a tissue.

22. Put some panties on for Christ's sake.

23. Eat something!! You are starting to look like a Victoria's Secret Model!!

24. Don't pick that up, I got it.

25. Happy Anniversary!!!

26. Hey, isn't today your mothers birthday??

27. Let's talk, I miss talking.

LOL Z, what part of "hit enter twice" do you not understand?

-- (duuuh@duuuh.duuuuh), November 04, 2000.

Sheesh...lighten up!!!

-- (EmmaP1616@hotmail.com), November 04, 2000.

Yes, I agree Emma. I had no problem reading your original post, it wasn't necessary for Z to lecture you. :-)

-- (laugh@and.be.mellow), November 04, 2000.

LOL:

Well, it worked. I got what I wanted. You formatted it. :^) Good job and thanks.

Welcome Emma.

Best wishes,,,,,

Z

-- Z1X4Y7 (Z1X4Y7@aol.com), November 04, 2000.

Z:

That exchange was funnier than hell, but you shouldn't bait these newcomers.

So how was it flying on a LearJet rather than commericial. Inquiring minds want to know. Gregor and I have set up a Baker trip. Get back to us. Once again, LOL.

DB

-- DB (Debunker@nevermore.xxx), November 04, 2000.

Howdy DB:

If you felt like fixins in a sausage stuffer in an MD-80 you don't want to try one. Of course the food is much better. United doesn't give me caviar and imported wine. I have been flying all day. I need to get some sleep. Apologies to anyone that I inadvertantly offended.

Best wishes,,,,

Z

-- Z1X4Y7 (Z1X4Y7@aol.com), November 04, 2000.

1. I think Barry Manilow is one cool Son of a Bitch.

OK, maybe he ain't cool, but hearing Mandy in an elevator or supermarket brings a wet one to my eye, still.

-- Bingo1 (howe9@shentel.net), November 04, 2000.

28. I love cats.

-- Carlos (riffraff@cybertime.net), November 05, 2000.

29. I'll do the dishes so you can get an early start shopping.

-- dinosaur (dinosaur@williams-net.com), November 05, 2000.

I hate dishes AND shopping..as a matter of fact, would rather do dishes than shop...GRRRRRrrrr...

-- (EmmaP1616@hotmail.com), November 06, 2000.

30. Honey, why dont you just relax, I'll get the housework today.

31. Can I move the chair while you vaccum around me?

32. Here is the card, go buy yourself something

33. Happy Birthday, here are your flowers. :-0

PS the list IS endless.

-- consumer (shh@aol.com), November 06, 2000.

34. It is not the meat it is the motion

-- FutureShock (gray@matter.think), November 06, 2000.