Y2K Conspiracy Continues By Oliver Del Signore

With the cooperation of virtually every media outlet world-wide, a massive cover-up of the end of the world as we know it continues. Designed to prevent panic and rioting, governments around the world, under the supervision of the New World Order at the United Nations, have ensured all electronic and print media participate in the scheme.

During the last moments of 1999, government troops in stealth helicopters released a powerful, secret hypnotic aerosol over all population centers world wide. The gas, nicknamed DUFUS29, causes those exposed to believe, without question, anything they are told and is so powerful, it is able to penetrate into all but the most secure military underground shelters in a matter of seconds. Only members of the New World Order were given the proper inoculation sequence to enable them to resist the effects of the gas.

We have learned the release took place in each time zone according to a pre-set schedule. Following the release, powerful loudspeakers attached to the helecopters played pre-recorded messages designed to convince a now pliable populace the new year was arriving without incident. Early reports confirm that people in all countries continued their celebrations as lights went out, planes crashed and nuclear power plants began meltdown.

The brainwashing induced by DUFUS29 is so complete, those exposed never recover. For the rest of their lives, they will continue to believe what they were told. Not only will they continue to believe, their brains will actually manufacture false images to enable them to function within the framework of the implanted fantasy.

In the United States, millions of people stayed home this year rather than tempt fate, terrorists, and the Y2K bug. Armed with bottles of champaign, they sat transfixed, counting down the last seconds of 1999. Even when a misprogrammed transformer switch caused the power to fail several seconds before midnight throughout the Northeast grid, everyone under the influence of DUFUS29 continued the countdown and their respective private celebrations, convinced their now blank TV screens were still broadcasting images live from Times Square in New York City.

The New World Order will coordinate the cleanup and recovery from the many disasters, using DUFUS29 exposed workers who will think they are constructing parks, building homeless shelters, planting trees, saving whales etc. Estimates range from twelve to fifteen years to restore civilization to it's pre-Y2K levels.

Under normal circumstances, the massive New Year's Eve effort would have cost nearly $830 billion dollars. However, we have learned all the major suppliers and contractors were deliberately exposed to the gas and now believe they donated the materials and services.

Due to the near universal exposure of the world population to the gas, we fully understand that almost no one reading this account today will believe it. Still, we publish it in the hope that it will survive so future generations will know the truth of what happened during this time, that the Y2K bug was as real and as dangerous as everyone claimed, and that, were it not for the efforts of a small group of pseudo-intellectuals who really did know what was best for us all, human civilization would surely have disappeared from the face of the Earth.

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-- hch (ds@gf.l), September 10, 2000

Answers

Good thing some of us stock no faith in your material world. Are you the "Scarry Monger", some of us have seen death, we do not fear it. You act like the "boogy man". for some, who have not seen, may seem scary. You keep on, the "Right Will Survive".

-- Scary ,Crendo (forthose@fear.com), September 10, 2000.

Some of you don't seem to live in the real world. What I want you to do is research some of what was said last year and compare it to this year. Forget y2k that is not important. what is important is the other things going on. People can be fooled with lies, Now ask youselves why the lies in the first place. WHO WHAT WHEN WHERE AND HOW COME!

-- ET (bneville@zebra.net), September 10, 2000.

Del Signore

Italian. Interesting. Did you author this satire piece, cpr?

-- Inquiring minds (want@to.know), September 10, 2000.

Y2K Conspiracy Continues By Oliver Del Signore

Cpr likes to throw Italian phrases into his writing. That's what makes me curious about this.

-- Inquiring minds (want@to.know), September 10, 2000.

http://www.backwoodshome.com/humor/delsignore000105.html

Y2K Conspiracy Continues

Oliver Del Signore is a wannabe comedian and the webmaster of Backwoods Home Magazine's world famous web site. He welcomes fawning praise for his writing at webmaster@backwoodshome.com but suggests critics keep their know-nothing opinions to themselves.

-- Nope. (It@ain't.Cpr), September 10, 2000.

Neat.

Now they see CPR around every corner.

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

ROTFLOLOLOL

VERY.

-- cpr (buytexas@swbell.net), September 10, 2000.