Dear Mr. President...Thank You!

greenspun.com : LUSENET : TB2K spinoff uncensored : One Thread

A wonderful, anonymous and open letter to Bill Clinton is circulating on the Internet, and we thought of sharing it with our readers, especially as the Clinton administration draws to an end ...

Dear Mr. President,

I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, "Thank me, I voted for Clinton-Gore." So, I sat down and reflected on that and I am sending my "Thank you" for what you have done, specifically:

1. Thank you for introducing us to Gennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and, of course, Juanita Broaddrick, who told NBC that you raped her. Are there any others that we should know about?

2. Thank you for teaching my 8-year-old about oral sex. I had really planned to wait until he was about 10 or so to discuss it with him, but now he knows more about it than I did as a senior in college. The cigar thing was also neat for the kids. 3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place (especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you have to know is what the meaning of "IS" is. It really is great to know that certain sexual acts are not sex and one person may have sex while the other one involved does NOT have sex. Monica said frequently while you were on the phone, she would work at one end, and you at the other. What productivity!

4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new generation and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie "Wag The Dog" could be plausible after all. The people of the Sudan, Afghanistan and Serbia are all running to rent the video, now that you made them part of the story.

5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford look graceful, Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look truthful, and John Kennedy look moral.

6. Thank you for the 72 House and Senate witnesses who have pleaded the 5th Amendment and 17 witnesses who have fled the country to avoid testifying about Democrat campaign fund raising. 7. Thank you for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4 imprisonments from the Whitewater "mess" and the 55 criminal charges and 32 criminal convictions (so far) in the other "Clinton" scandals. 8. Thanks for remembering the families of many deceased people who once were your friends, who served you and died so young and suddenly: Vince Foster, Jerry Parks, Ron Brown, Admiral Boorda, Les Aspin, Barbara Alice Wiese, Mary Mahoney, Jim McDougal et al. 9. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, "gutting" much of our foreign policy, and for providing no real missile defense system for the American people. Thank you for sharing with our Chinese friends all of our nuclear weapon designs, the supercomputer technology to build such weapons, the ballistic missile technology so they can have more accurate missiles, and the encryption technology so they can keep it all secret too. 10. You are amazing visiting all those countries! Thank you for flying all over the world on "vacations" carefully disguised as necessary trips. It's wonderful, too, how you have surpassed every other president in the size of your entourage on these trips: 75 jumbo jets, 2000 guests to China alone. Your Africa entourage also was remarkable and it was nice of you to bring Betty Currie. She needed a break from testifying before the grand jury.

Please give my regards to Hillary, when/if you see her. Tell her I'm working on a "Thank You" letter for her. Looking forward to January 2001,

Average Joe

-- Honest Citizen (-@taxpayer.too!), July 29, 2000

Answers

Well Honest Citizen, stop sitting around moping/whining while writing these silly letters and get out and do something to improve the quality of your life and the lives of those around you.

-- Honest Joe (I@also.payTaxes), July 29, 2000.

Thanks, Honest Joe: Seems these people don't realize that the president is just the reflection of the public which put him into office. Perhaps we'd better start cleaning up our own lives so we can put THAT reflection in the Whitehouse.

-- HonestJane (Ima@taxpayer.too), July 29, 2000.

And Than You, Dishonest Citizen, for a worthless post full of right-wing lies. I don't have time to listen to Rush, so your brief summary saved me a lot of time.

-- (right-wingers@are.hypocritical.liars), July 29, 2000.

..as the Clinton administration draws to an end.. I'll believe that come next Jan..I'm not sure he's ready to give it up just yet..

-- george (jones@choices.com), July 29, 2000.

honesty=best policy!!and here comes RA,RA!

-- al-d. (dogs@zianet.com), July 29, 2000.


"1. Thank you for introducing us to Gennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and, of course, Juanita Broaddrick, who told NBC that you raped her. Are there any others that we should know about?"

These women SOUGHT OUT publicity. And while Juanita Broadrick told NBC that Clinton raped her, this is not the story she had been saying in the the twenty intervening years since the "attack". She changed her story several times over the intervening years, something she does not have in common with the majority of survivors of sexual assault.

"2. Thank you for teaching my 8-year-old about oral sex. I had really planned to wait until he was about 10 or so to discuss it with him, but now he knows more about it than I did as a senior in college. The cigar thing was also neat for the kids."

YOU as a parent are responsible for what your child watches on TV, reads on the web and hears on the radio. Don't neglect that responsibility and then get upset when your child hears something you don't want her to hear.

"3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place (especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you have to know is what the meaning of "IS" is. It really is great to know that certain sexual acts are not sex and one person may have sex while the other one involved does NOT have sex. Monica said frequently while you were on the phone, she would work at one end, and you at the other. What productivity!"

Wait a minute. If you're so upset about descriptions of the President's sex life then why do you wallow in those descriptions?

"4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new generation and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie "Wag The Dog" could be plausible after all. The people of the Sudan, Afghanistan and Serbia are all running to rent the video, now that you made them part of the story."

You can thank Ken Starr and the Republicans for impeachment. As for "Wag the Dog", I think you should be careful to remember that not everything you see on TV is reality. Sometimes people imagine stories that have a grain of current events in them. There never was a China Syndrome, no Manchurian Candidate, and no mutant super heroes being legislated against in the Congress.

While we're on the subject of fact vs. fiction, here's a link to the truth about the so-called "Clinton Body Count".

Clinton Body Count Bullshit

-- Citizen Ruth (ruth_parker@yahoo.com), July 29, 2000.


"YOU as a parent are responsible for what your child watches on TV, reads on the web and hears on the radio. Don't neglect that responsibility and then get upset when your child hears something you don't want her to hear."

Thank you, Ruth. That one paragraph kind of says it all.

Yet another "parent" blaming his child's problems on everything but his parenting. What a surprise.

Like I said, you need a license to drive a car, but any moron can have a child.

-- Patricia (PatriciaS@lasvegas.com), July 29, 2000.


Paricia--

Very true, but would you really want it any other way? Would you want some bureaucrats deciding who was qualified to reproduce? Talk about Fascism!

-- Lars (lars@indy.net), July 29, 2000.


No, Lars, I would not -- and that's not what I meant by that. I don't think it should be up to anyone but the PARENTS to decide that; but if they make such a decision, PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY should be Number One on their list of Things I Need To Know Before I Have A Child.

I sometimes feel that my particular generation was probably the last one to be taught any kind of personal responsibility. Of course, I only see this from one perspective -- *mine* -- and that could be flawed ;-)

-- Patricia (PatriciaS@lasvegas.com), July 29, 2000.


Moderation questions? read the FAQ