ACCEPTANCE:

"Life has no other discipline to impose, if we would but realize it, than to accept life unquestioningly. Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate, or despise, serves to defeat us in the end. What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such."

Henry Miller

This contains so of the elements of yesterday's DeMello message, and is a lot shorter! I have found everything in this qoute to be true. I went through the horrors of drug addiction and find through recovery, and the beautiful life I have today, that that experience is intrinsic to helping myself and others.

I DO try to live my life through acceptance; I will calmly(most of the time) tell someone that their behavior is "unacceptable"-acceptance does not mean you should be a roll-over. It means that you calmy state your objection to the behavior, and that you do not judge the actor.

My serenity is directly proportional to the amount of acceptance I have in my life today.

-- FutureShock (gray@matter.think), July 20, 2000

Answers

Unconditional love, acceptance, discrimination, introspection. These are the key tools I employ in my lifes work.

I associate acceptance with unconditional love. My path is one of devotion (bhakti). In order for me to accept all, to receive all into my life, in the moment, I must find the unconditional love within. Once activated, I am then able to engage others from a center of love. It is from this vantage point that I am best able to turn aside internally-generated judgments except for the purpose of assessing people and actions using the scalpel of discrimination.

Acceptance plays a large role in my use of introspection. It does great harm to beat oneself up over transgressions, real or imagined. Introspection is not a tool for the timid. One must achieve some semblance of balance prior to engaging in introspective thought in order to avoid skewing the data. Skewed data yields erroneous results when processed. That I learned to accept my lapses in right thinking and action led to my being able to forgive  both myself and others. This was a giant leap forward for me.

Acceptance plays a more silent role in the process of discrimination. I can accept the perceived wrong actions of another yet I must take it a step further. Evaluation of the person and their actions is necessary. This is an ongoing process. Love, experience, acceptance. Without adding discrimination to the mix ones life would be a series of random encounters. The sharper the razor, the more focused the attention, the more progress one can achieve in the pursuit of goals.

Thank you, FS, for activating the ever-popular team of brain cell & heart once again (brain cell is singular in my case). Contemplation put on public display is a glorious habit to nurture. This is one of your many contributions, my friend.

JG

-- Positive Vibration (howe9@shentel.net), July 20, 2000.

Where, then, is the proper role of the warrior? What is step two? Do you first object to unpleasant behavior but, ultimately, find you must go to the alley with it? What is the response to tyranny? How does the tyrant -- or the victim -- separate the element of appeasement from the element of acceptance?

Tentative acceptance of a proposition or situation is one aspect that is vital to the understanding of it. True understanding requires the type of discrimination that tolerates exploration of intrinsic position -- its good and bad elements, acceptable and nonacceptable consequences.

In the end, however, why shouldn't a range of responses include nonacceptance? To make acceptance the preferred or only viable alternative is to lose true discrimination, and possibly the right option of response.

-- Oxy (Oxsys@aol.com), July 20, 2000.

Oxy--

Exactly what I was thinking. FS and Pos, I'm sure you are capable of righteous anger; I'm sure that you rage at injustice. How do you allow for this in a way that is consistent with acceptance?

-- Lars (lars@indy.net), July 20, 2000.

Lars,

On the day you need (or want) anger, you quote a different author who goes along with your mood. Simple.

Frank

-- Someone (ChimingIn@twocents.cam), July 20, 2000.

I'm sure you are capable of righteous anger...

You bet, Lars. Experienced this just yesterday. Anger is a state of temporary insanity, IMO. Do I accept rage? Well, it exists and must be dealt with quickly so therefore I must accept it. I gathered up all my will in order to sort through the righteous rage of yesterday. The warrior within me stiffened his spine, called on the rational mind, deepened the breath, opened the heart.

I believe strongly in personal responsibility. This alone weakened the rage somewhat by providing detachment from the actions of the others involved. I began to take slow, deep breaths (in the gaps between the waves of quaking in my body). I also was able to discuss the source of the anger with someone very special. This opened my heart to compassion while at the same time it forced me to take back control over my analytical side.

Whew! It is a rare day when I rage at anything or anyone. Love and anger cannot co-exist. I choose love.

-- Bingo1 (howe9@shentel.net), July 20, 2000.

Absolutely nothing to do with the initial post:

Life is a series of skirmishes, within and without. The warrior within each of us derives from combining all the elements which make up an individual and solidifying these seemingly disparate parts so one can go into battle with confidence, flexibility, detachment, compassion. This is why establishing good habits in ones life is so necessary. We are in continuous training for battle, whether we choose to define it as such or not.

These battles arent necessarily fought in the back alleys and boardrooms. I fight internal wars each day. When the last mortars have been fired, arms put down, prisoners exchanged, introspection and discrimination wend their way over the battlefield, sorting and tagging the winners and losers. Questions are raised, assessments and evaluations compiled. This is the life of a warrior.

Each moment is an opportunity in which we can defeat enemies, cull negatives, progress on our life path, gather comrades, establish footholds, discover new friends, lend aid to Dear Onesor we can cave in to the will of others, the will of our demons. Either way we choose. "If you choose not to decide you still have made a choice" - Neil Peart.

One need not have the outer appearance of a Klingon to exhibit the spirit of a warrior.

-- Bingo1 (howe9@shentel.net), July 20, 2000.

Frank:

Don't know why I need to quote anyone but here goes:

Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Dylan Thomas

It can be made to refer to more than death. Resist forever;

Never accept .

DB

-- DB (Debunker@nomore.xxx), July 20, 2000.

OK

-- OK (Ok@some.zzz), July 20, 2000.

off

-- Not Me (no@no.no), July 20, 2000.

Frank:

Do I sense an air of fickleness with you? Do you mean to say that I select qoutes that only reflect my mood of the day, or that on the day I really get mad I am going to change personality and do something different? I hope not. I have not scuffled with you in awhile, and I do not want to now-And i will not. I just want to ascertain if, in a way, you are denigrating what I have posted or choose to post.

Not that it really matters. LOL.

Oxy-

I may be able to respond to your question later.

-- FutureShock (gray@matter.think), July 20, 2000.

"called on the rational mind"

Always a good idea Bingo. Have a good 1.

-- Ra (tion@l.1), July 20, 2000.

FutureShock-

Thanks for this quote! So true.

Bingo-

I too choose love, for - "Love never fails." - 1 Cor 13:8

-- (bygrace@thru.faith), July 20, 2000.

DB,

Thanks for the post. I don't know though, I guess I'm just not that "deep" when it comes to poetry. When the end is definitely near, why not go peacefully? Why would Thomas implore his father to fight his fate when the likely result would be that (he'd still die) and the family would think he was unhappy in the end? Why not be happy to finally be unleased from your Earthly shackles and about to meet the Lord?

But thanks for the post! And it's **much** better than what I was thinking of:

Death! Death to all who oppose us! (from some evil guy in Heavy Metal)

FS,

Yes, I was just poking around with a stick a bit I guess, but didn't mean to be really malicious about it. No need for an discussion, as by now you can probably guess what I'm going to say without the bother of my saying it (apologies to J.R.R. T.).

Good night and Good Wishes,

Frank

-- Someone (ChimingIn@twocents.cam), July 20, 2000.

Oops,

"an argument" was half-way changed to "a discussion" and came out as "an discussion".

Please correct it with whichever you feel more appropriate.

Frank

-- Someone (ChimingIn@twocents.cam), July 20, 2000.

It's ok to accept it.....just keep checking to make sure you know which is right and which is wrong.

-- Will (righthere@home.now), July 20, 2000.

Is not every golden moment ripe for the possibilities of giving unconditional love to one another without judgement? Can the open mind not reach out to another being in human kindness without the giving of himself? Can we not care for each other in joy and happiness without pre-concieved notions or conditions or the "self defined scalpel of discrimination" and say that I care? Is discrimination necessary if we reach out to others we encounter who are in need of friendship or caring or love without expectations? If we do not have unconditional love from within, it is not possible to share it with others. Can we not put aside our beliefs as we have come to know them, to say I care-it matters not what your philosophy is, what your definitions are-I am here as are you-let me soothe your way. Let us connect and experience the moment. Does that not connect us to the greater sense of our humanity and to our God? Can we not accept others perceptions that differ from ours without disagreeing? Or is right thinking but another perception? What I define is right thinking may not be what you define as right thinking. Where is the line drawn, and must it be drawn? Can we not all connect, smile, and agree that we travel this life together, with different philosophies and still appreciate one the other without judgement? To appreciate each the other is a heavenly gift. Diversity of thought brings an appreciation of each contributor when one considers the others position.

Warriors define themselves. Those who choose to fight, whether it be the back alley or real life, come with a sense of purpose, real or imagined. Intrinsic, by definition, the warrior is at the ready to defend that which they feel has been wronged. Again the right option is but a perception of the perceiver.

Are we not all only a product of our experiences up until this point in time, rather than that solidly held belief to which we affix our present identity? Can we not change and transform ourselves as life progresses?

Must we all "just accept it" but by our own definitions? Can we do no else. Only our defintions and perceptions change over time. We must all make decisions, what will be yours?

-- Aunt Bee (Aunt__Bee@hotmail.com), July 21, 2000.

"Sing songs that none have sung,

Think thoughts that ne'er in brain has rung,

Walk in paths that none have trod,

Weep tears as none have shed for God,

Give peace to all to whom none other gave,

Claim him your own who's everywhere disclaimed.

Love all with love that none have felt, and brave

The battle of life with strength unchained."

---------------------- Paramahansa Yogananda

Enjoy the day, my friends.

-- Bingo1 (howe9@shentel.net), July 21, 2000.