A difficult, but nonetheless, important spiritual principle described below by Anthony DeMello:

"Anytime you're practicing renunciation, you're deluded. How about that! You're deluded. What are you renouncing? Anytime you renounce something, you are tied forever to the thing you renounce. There's a guru in India who says, 'every time a prostitute comes to me, she's talking about nothing but God. She says I'm sick of this life that I'm living. I want God. But everytime the priest comes to me he's talking about nothing but sex'. Very well, when you renounce something, you're stuck to it forever. As long as you are fighting it, you are giving it power. You give it as much power as you are using to fight it.

This includes communism and everything else. So you must receive your demons, because when you fight them, you empower them. Has nobody ever told you this? When you renounce something you are tied to it. The only way to get out of this is to see through it. Don't renounce it, SEE THROUGH IT. Understand its true value and you won't need to renounce it; it will just drop from your hands. But of course, if you don't see that, if you are hypnotized into thinking that you won't be happy without this, that, or the other thing, you're stuck. What we need to do for you is not what so-called spirituality attempts to do-namely, to get you to make sacrifices, to renounce things. That's useless. You're still asleep. What we need to do is to help you understand, understand, understand. If you understood, you'd simply drop the desire for it. This is another way of saying: If you woke up, you'd simply drop the desire for it."

This paradox was difficult for me at first. Then I started to apply it to the resentments I had in my life. I was introduced to this principle by a spiritual advisor who stated the resentment tied me to the very person I was upset with. That that person was probably not "wasting any time" thinking about me, and that I was letting that person "rent space in my head". When I let go of the resentment-really tried to let go-a wonderful thing happened. That person or thing I resented no longer had any power over me or my feelings.

Food for thought.

-- FutureShock (gray@matter.think), July 13, 2000

Answers

This reminds me of the concept that "the place of greatest resistance is also the doorway to breakthrough"...give up the struggle and new energies and opportunities are allowed to flow.

-- LunaC (Thanks@GoodReminder.com), July 13, 2000.

FS, when you were a kid, di'ja ever play with one of them "Chinese finger traps"?

You know. The kind that looks like a short tube woven out of straw, and you stuck your two index fingers into the ends of the tube and tried to take them out again, but if you pulled your fingers straight out, the trap just clamped down harder.

Those were tricky little thingees, weren't they?

-- Brian McLaughlin (brianm@ims.com), July 13, 2000.

Yes I Did. Great analoogy, Brian. Glad to see you today, Luna-been thinking about ya.

-- FutureShock (gray@matter.think), July 13, 2000.

Hello FS,

Good post here. Been thinking along similar lines. Most of those 'renting space in my head' are superfluous to requirements. Surprising how little is needed to sustain an interesting life.

Thanks etc...

Regards from OZ

-- Pieter (zaadz@icisp.net.au), July 13, 2000.

cpr, call your office.

-- (nemesis@awol.com), July 13, 2000.

FutureShock,

Excellent! If you let the actions of others, especially those you do not care for, effect you, you are giving them permission to control you.

We have had plenty of examples of that here and at TB2K, I have used that form of manipulation myself, for my own agenda.

Before anyone gets their knickers in an uproar, that agenda I mentioned was to allow others to expose themselves by their own actions.

-- Cherri (sams@brigadoon.com), July 14, 2000.

Have to say that this post of yours, Future Shock, could NOT have come at a better time. Thanks for posting it.

-- Patricia (PatriciaS@lasvegas.com), July 14, 2000.

LOL!

Now I can forget my old girlfriend!

Thanks. Good post.

-- Buddy (buddydc@go.com), July 14, 2000.

This is SO true, FS. The same can be said about fear, ya know. I spent a good portion of my life watching that Kung Fu series with the Caradine(sp?) guy who folks say in real life is an alcoholic. Anyway, I listened to the lessons. Each time someone attempted to REJECT something, the Kung Fu guy would suggest that they ACCEPT it, ABSORB it, as once it's a PART of you, it can be understood. Once the fear, hate, whatever, is UNDERSTOOD, it becomes as important as all other things which are understood. [Sorry for the crappy translation of the philosophy.]

-- Anita (Anita_S3@hotmail.com), July 14, 2000.

Thanks all for confirming I was not out on a spiritual limb here. Glad you found it useful.

-- FutureShock (gray@matter.think), July 14, 2000.

Thanks all for confirming I was not out on a spiritual limb here

The only time you have to worry about being on a spiritual limb is when someone's at the other end with a saw. Thankfully those responding to this thread weren't equipped with cutlery. -g-

-- LunaC (Refreshing@Change.com), July 14, 2000.

FS,

I have long held to the concept of not "renting space in my head" to worthless bullshit that others are more than happy to foist upon me.If it is worthwhile though I invite them to have as much space as needed and will gladly foot the bill for additional sguare footage if needed.

I have always found this policy to be beneficial to me,the landlord and to potential rentors.

Thanks for a living post ; )

-- capnfun (capnfun1@excite.com), July 15, 2000.

Capn - I have long held to the concept of not "renting space in my head" to worthless bullshit that others are more than happy to foist upon me.

Well said. And I've found "journaling" to be an excellent way to offload emotions, erase the blackboard of the mind and keep the endless-loop-tape of mind chatter from running in the background. I may end up killing more than my fair share of trees in the process but the trade off is greater peace of mind.

-- LunaC (Blank@write.com), July 15, 2000.

Sage advise, LunaC. Journaling is incredibly productive. I have not done it in a long time, and this is a reminder to start up again. Thanks.

-- FutureShock (gray@matter.think), July 15, 2000.