Comment about "Match Made In Heaven" : LUSENET : ER Discussions : One Thread

I just have one complaint about "Match Made In Heaven". That is when Carol tried to compare her life changes with Carter's. I couldn't believe that she actually did that. There is a MAJOR difference between the two. Carter and Lucy were stabbed by a psycho. Lucy died and Carter survived. Now in Carol's case Doug left her and now she has two daughters she's raising by herself. Now what Carol was going through was bad but what Carter was going through is ALOT worse. How could she compare a Doug leaving to Carter and Lucy being stabbed and Lucy dying from that is totally beyond me. I think that was the dumbest thing she ever said to someone. Yes she tried to help Carter but it didn't work. She should have said something like "Carter, what you went through was horrible. I can't even imangine what this must be like. But you do have friends who care about you and want to help you." That would have been alot better in my opinion.

-- Cammie (, July 04, 2000


I liked how he tried to help him but that was the wrong way to do it. I kept saying "Carol, are you nuts? How can you compare those two things?"

-- Andie (, July 04, 2000.

Why the hell do people keep saying she was trying to compare the two. I certainly didn't see it that way. She was simply remarking how things can just suddenly change. I did not see it as her thinking her problems were equal to Carter's. She only commented on how she knows what its like to have your life change on you. She wasn't comparing the 2 situations.

Carol's given Carter several pep talks over the years. ("Welcome Back Carter"..."Post Mortem"...) I think her "big sister" relationship with him is rather sweet.

-- JLS (, July 04, 2000.

Still, I think that that conversation was more meant to be for Carter, not Carol. To be honest, I think that at that point in his life, Carter could care less about Carol's problems. He had a lot more of HIS problems to deal with.

-- Jamie (, July 05, 2000.

While I felt that it was nice of Carol to take some time and try to reach out to Carter, her comments left much to be desired. A person who has gone through a horrific attack on their life doesn't need to be told that "hey, life is gonna change in bad ways sometimes so we just need to learn to deal with it and move on." I've always liked Carol and her relationship with Carter, but I couldn't help but feel that her comments were a bit selfish and thoughtless. It sounded to me as if she were trying to talk about her own situation, not help Carter. JMO...

-- Anja (, July 05, 2000.

Carol could be talking in general. Like her trying to commit suicide in Season 1?! Remember that people?! She came closer to dying than Carter. She was probably referencing both the fact that she's raising two daughters on her own, and the fact that she understands what it's like to come back to any semblance of a normal after a near death experience.

-- AmyE (, July 05, 2000.

Carol's comments bothered me at first,too, but I really think she was trying to help Carter in her own way. Carol keeps her private thoughts/emotions private, so in a way it was a big deal that she opened up even a little to Carter. And I don't think she was trying to compare situations. She was saying that your life can change in a blink of an eye, that you're never really prepared for what gets thrown at you.

The comment "It's always gonna be something, Carter" really bothered me, simply because he was going through so much at that moment. And her advice to "go back to work" wasn't exactly helpful to him. But I offer these two things in Carol's defense:

1. Carter had been putting on an act that he was fine. He was certainly coming off as being more recovered than he actually was. So Carol might have altered her advice had she known he was suffering from insomnia, having flashbacks to the attack and using drugs.

2. Carol, in my opinion, was completely out of the ER loop during season 6. Her life had taken quite a few twists and turns, and she was caught up in her own world of raising twins alone and trying to figure out what to do with the rest of her life. I believe the writers meant for that conversation to be awkward, because it just proved how Carol wasn't her old self, how some part of her was missing. There was such a sadness to her in that scene. I think that was one of the many times during the season I was yelling at her to get on a plane to Seattle and get it over with. She tried to help Carter, but she was so far removed from what was going on with him that she couldn't. She couldn't even figure out why he overreacted to Pablo! I think it was a matter of good intentions. It probably DID help Carter to be able to share the news about Lucy's match without someone asking him how he was doing or what kind of pain he was in or if he was seeing a shrink. But I think he was silently begging for more help than Carol could give.

-- Avan (, July 06, 2000.

I didn't think then, nor do I think now, that Carol was trying to compare her life with Carter's. She was simple saying that she knows what it's like for life to change on you. Her life DID change, there's no denying that, and she knows how hard it is to deal with it. Carter's life changed, there's no denying that either, and she wanted to let him know that it's hard to deal with and he just may need time.

I tend to think that in SSS when Letting the Cables Sleep is playing, their pains are being contrasted once again. The song continues to play as Carter, unable to sleep because of the recent events of life, gets out of bed. Then Carol, unable to sleep because of the recent events of her life, gets out of bed. Maybe there is more comparison then we think.

-- Joanne (, July 06, 2000.

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