Okay, the last important news item of the day...

from:

Last Night's Top Ten

Top Ten Signs The Supreme Court Needs A Vacation

10. Most of their rulings taken word-for-word from that day's "Judge Judy."

9. Court's last opinion was written on back of Club Med brochure.

8. Justices frequently announce, "My verdict is tails...I mean, guilty."

7. Overwhelmingly repealed the "one person per robe" rule.

6. Rehnquist has been "pounding the gavel" four, maybe five times a day.

5. Most days court consists of three justices and six magic 8 balls.

4. Just held tribal council and voted out Justice Anthony Kennedy.

3. Last couple of cases each day are decided by the cleaning crew.

2. Only thing they're arguing lately is margaritas vs. daiquiris.

1. Oath witnesses must take: "Do you swear blah blah blah?"

-- eve (eve_rebekah@yahoo.com), June 28, 2000