I don't know the why or the how, but she's coming back. After a six year passionately adoring relationship, we parted ways and headed in our own directions. Her direction led her to an Ecuadorian man of significantly more stable lifestyle and a two years later (last month) a baby. As far as I'm able to tell, she happy and I'm over her. I've since had another relationship that lasted a year, am single now but I'm content. I haven't gagged at another wedding invitation and watching couples bill and coo at each other no longer sends me into a fit of rage comparable to the Hulk ("Incredible" sort, not "Hogan"). So why... (and here's where I finally make my point) why has she come back? She is still physically in Ecuador with her husband and child. But lately she's been creeping back in my mind. Without bitterness, without regret, without longing. She's just taken residence in a part of my mind that I use daily.

-- jack of spades (jacklewis6@hotmail.com), June 07, 2000

Answers

I think some people are just permanent. Like no matter what happens, that person will stick in your life. I've got a man in my brain that I haven't seen in six years. Thinking about him hasn't ever prevented me from letting other people into my life, so I don't think there's anything wrong with pondering him every once in awhile. But just between you and me, I hope he thinks of me sometimes, too.

-- sarahjane (sarahjane@dellazine.com), June 07, 2000.

Throw her old panties in the river and go doink a friend of hers..so bloody simple. People are so sappy. Maybe every year you could build a big efigy of this Ecudorian stud prince and light it on fire- perhaps in time a large festival full of trust-afarians and Phish fans will blossom and thus, your void is filled...NDW

-- N.D.Blanc (whin0001@unf.edu), June 07, 2000.

I don't know when I became sappy. Maybe sometime after I heard the "When Harry Met Sally" soundtrack, and witnessed its effect on certain girls. I'm sometimes cynical and sometimes naive. I guess I could change that romanticist attitude but... I kinda don't want to.

-- jack (jacklewis6@hotmail.com), June 07, 2000.

Don't change... at least not if you like who you are.

I have a few people that pop into my mind from time to time as well. Some are old girlfriends, some wishful girlfriends, some old guy friends, but all are FRIENDS. I miss them, I miss not being a part of their life and, as SarahJane mentioned, I hope that they think of me on occasion. We chose different paths though; if they converge again, great. If not, it was still fun.

-- Chris Hansen (tchansen@xmission.com), June 08, 2000.

I'm a friend of N.D.'s, so I can bust him and say he's one of the sappiest, romantic-minded, and sensitive people I know. He just likes to front.

A little sappy, a little naive, a little romantic...in moderation, those are some of the best people qualities around.

-- sarahjane (sarahjane@dellazine.com), June 08, 2000.