Beaver insurgent caughtgreenspun.com : LUSENET : TB2K spinoff uncensored : One Thread
Police capture one notorious Bucky Beaver
By Messenger Staff
ST. ALBANS CITY - Police have manned traps over recent days in an effort to capture stray cats. Local police on Saturday issued the following press release : "St. Albans City Police Officers were unable to snag any furry felines, but were able to bag a wild beaver. "The incident, which took place on Friday, April 07, 2000, occurred when the police department received multiple telephone calls reporting a beaver on the town. "The beaver was first spotted at the Hot Dot parking lot on North Main Street, traveling south until reaching the intersection of Lake Street. "Officers were called to the scene and pursued the terrified tree biter down Lake Street to the parking lot next to the Moose Club. "The deviated dam builder was then captured by Sergeant William Sweeny and Patrolman Jason Stoddard and placed in protective custody. "`Bucky' was then transported to St. Albans Bay and released on his own recognizance. After his release, the beaver couldn't help but attempt to soak the officers with a splash of his tail. "Can beavers smile?"
-- - (firstname.lastname@example.org), April 12, 2000
Bro Possum wishes to bring to the attention of everyone that the 'recognizance' by 'Bucky the Brave' will be considered null and void, having been obtained under duress while in the lockup. There isn't any court in the land willing to uphold such knavery.
Congratulations Bucky. Please continue to make a splash for freedom!
'Long live the Anarchists of the Rodent Revolution!'
Posted by scribe to the mascots of the Olympics 2000
"Keeping the Dream Alive!"
-- Pieter (email@example.com), April 12, 2000.
OH NO!! We MUST tell Ashton and Leska that we have lost a loyal Agent-in-Place!! A stealth beaver has been repatriated!!
OH the HUMANITY!!
OH the RODENTIA!!!
LONG LIVE THE FRUITCAKE REVOLUTION!!!!
-- Fruitcake Resistance League Correspondent (FRLians@re.us), April 13, 2000.