This is a for real recipe sent from a friend. I followed (most of it) the recipe and served it at a local nursing home, they just loved it!

CLAM CHOWDER A LA INEZ or......HOW TO FEED 30 PEOPLE OR 2 HUNGRY TAR-HEELS (no offense to tar-heels, the originator of the recipe is a self-proclaimed tar-heel, and a lovely one at that!)

Git yourself a big bottle, I mean a big pot. Now that you've got the bottle, keep it, in fact take a swig.

Now set the BIG pot on the counter. You'll need, 7lbs taters, (no, not sweet taters, white taters).

6 cans evaporated milk, 2 lbs chopped clams, 4 or 5 strips of bacon (no not the whole hog), 3/4 cup chopped onion, 1 clove crushed garlic, 1 1/2 cups flour, 1/4 cup grated carrot, 1/2 tsp thyme, 1/2 tsp basil, 1 tblsp chopped parsley, 4 tblsp chicken boullion. Now take a long pull on that bottle you keep hid in the kitchen, you earned it. An it's time to begin.

Peel the taters, cut 'em up, put 'em in the pot with 4 quarts of water (if you don't have 4 quarts, a gallon will do). If you're in a hurry, use hot water, if you need extra time to chop wood for the cook stove, use cold water). Better hit that bottle again, you know, the one that you hide.

Now!!

Put the taters on to cook, and remember you ain't tryin to weld the pot to the stove so use moderate heat. As the taters start to cook, add the carrots. In skillet, (make sure you washed it after last nite's gravy), is it clean? O.K. Now chop the bacon into bits, put into your (clean) skillet and cook until most of the fat is cooked out, and again (we're not welding here) drain off fat, then add chopped onions & crushed garlic, pinch of salt and saute' until onions are clear looking.

While you got a sec. take a swig from your little bottle that nobody knows you got (but me of course!). Dump the bacon & onion mixture into the pot with the taters, stir gently, say something nice to it, I don't know if it helps, but it can't hurt, another swig is in order at this time.

Add the boullion, stir into taters, if taters are soft add the clams, (if it screams it wasn't clams, check for the cat) let 'em cook for 5 or 10 minutes gently, then in separate small bowel put the 1 1/2 cups of flour & enough water to make a thick paste (like wall paper paste) only a little thinner, then add to the taters gently stirring until thickened about 5 to 10 minutes, then add the evaporated milk, let get good and hot, not boiling, boiling ruins it (kills the clams). One more quick swig from you-know-what, drop in one stick of butter or margarine, stir gently. Finish bottle, by now you should have 2 pots of chowder on the stove (at least that's how you'll probably see 'em - remember your bottle?). Oh Yes, salt & pepper to taste.

Rolls are regular ol' yeast rolls.

-- Sammie (sammiex0@yahoo.com), March 14, 2000

Answers

Thanks, Sammie.....that was good for several belly laffs!

-- Jo Ann (MaJo@Michiana.com), March 14, 2000.