(OT) Australia's greatest challenge - rampaging galahs

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Galah Link

Lawn bowlers see pink over feathered pests

MORTLAKE lawn bowlers are on guard in a bid to ward off their greatest challenge of the season - rampaging galahs.

Members of the bowls club have resorted to a rotational early morning and evening ritual of standing guard to stop the galahs from destroying the bowling green.

Mobs of galahs have repeatedly dug holes in the green, prompting club members to report for galah duty from 6.30 to 8.30am and from 6 to 8.30pm.

Greenskeeper Ern Simpson yesterday said members took it in turns to watch out for approaching galahs. He said members clapped their hands and made as much noise as possible to scare the birds away.

Mr Simpson said members were left with no other option than to continue with the galah-watching operation until the end of the bowls season in April.

He said the galah problem had deteriorated in the past few years with mobs of up to 200 galahs now circling the club. "If we're not there they'll dig up areas. We have to continue doing this - we've got no choice."

Mr Simpson described the operation, which has been in force for the past two weeks, as successful but said it was also a bit of a "drag" keeping watch.

He said the damage caused by the galahs posed a problem for the club because it was time consuming and costly to maintain the green.

The damage also threatened to impact on the club's reputation as a good venue for inter-club competitions. "We're not going to get visiting clubs if there is patchy ground," Mr Simpson said.
. . . (Report: MARY PAPADAKIS)

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Comment:
Possum Power Rules, OK!!! We recruit 'em, we train 'em, we use 'em! Nobody is exempt from our assault! Surrender now or the galahs'll get you too. You cannot win!

Regards from galahville

-- Pieter (zaadz@icisp.net.au), February 10, 2000

Answers

pIeTeR, ThaNK You For kEEpInG Us uP To DatE wItH thE CrUcIaL IssUEs of tHe Day. ;)

-- number six (#@#.com), February 10, 2000.

Whoops. I neglected to explain to Americans that aspirants to Parliament and parliamentarians are referred to as "galahs". As they deem it fitting to take our guns we have been reduced to hand clapping to make a noice to frighten the galahs. A bit of a galah is a person with airy cerebral features who is quite often a lark, a hoot and a larrakin. A galah who gets nobbled is a drongo. Our national capital houses many galahs who when chattering a lot resemble a tree full of corellas...which brings about an unfortunate description for madness.

Regards from OZ

-- Pieter (zaadz@icisp.net.au), February 10, 2000.


Thanks, Number six. Resistance is futile. Viva the galah revolution! Support a drongo a day!

-- Pieter (zaadz@icisp.net.au), February 10, 2000.

Noise making: Try firing blank rounds from a shotgun. If that doesn't work, "non-blank" rounds will...

-- Mad Monk (madmonk@hawaiian.net), February 10, 2000.

More Rodent Victory in the offing!!!My Glorious and powerful Rodent Revolution is gaining ground Worldwide!!!Even the Downunder-Galah-Marsupials(?) are joining My valiant struggle Against the furless pink and brown Ape-Men!!!My Brothers and Loyal followers will be Ultimately Victorious in Our Grand Struggle!!!Soon, with the world's supply of Icy-cold Fosters under My Control, the World will finally have to sit up, and Negotiate a peace with the Rodent Revolution!!!Long Live The Squirrel King!!!Long Live The Rodent Revolution!!!

-- The Squirrel King (StillNuts@upina.Tree), February 10, 2000.


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