Engine Failure

Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left."

Thirty minutes later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours. But don't worry, we can fly just fine on two engines."

An hour later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours. But don't worry... we still have one engine left."

A young blonde passenger turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, "If we lose one more engine, we'll be up here all day!"

-- Laurane (familyties@rttinc.com), January 23, 2000

Answers

Here is a y2k joke..."What did the man say who spent $20,000 on solar panels for y2k?"...."darn!"

Here is another one,... "what did the man say sold his house and moved into a trailer out in the boondocks?" ..."darn!"

-- JoseMiami (caris@prodigy.net), January 24, 2000.

Jose, if I ever have to get up on stage and tell jokes, I want to be following you.

-- Peter Errington (petere@ricochet.net), January 24, 2000.

Hey Peter (chuckle) You are absolutely right. I'm not good a humor except when it is unintentional. You can follow me on the stage anytime. (smile0

-- JoseMiami (caris@prodigy.net), January 24, 2000.

The one that leaves in five minutes?

-- Connie (hive@gte.net), January 24, 2000.

The former yuppies who are now hillbillies will take target practice shooting beer bottles off of your head for not trying to warn them that y2k was not such a big deal.

-- Billy Vyper (billy_vyper@postmark.net), January 24, 2000.

"former yuppies" this is a good thing.

-- blonds still have more fun (last@saturday.nightlive), January 24, 2000.

Here is a few more:

I spoke to a fellow that bugged out to Arkansas for Y2K. He moved so far up into the Ozarks that all he could see was trees from his mountaintop hideaway. After 2 weeks, he had a knock on his door. It was a grizzled old man.

The old timers said, "Howdy, I am your nearest neighbor - I live about 2 miles over yonder. I came over to invite you to a party tommorrow night."

The Y2Ker thanked him and pondered well it has been a little quiet maybe I should meet the locals.

The geezer continued, "But I have to warn you there is probably going to be some drinkin;"

The Y2Ker thought no problem and said: "That's fine."

The geezer continued, "Yeah, and there might be some swearin'."

The Y2Ker' said: "I've heard it all before." The geezer said: "Yeah there might even be some sex."

At this the Y2Ker got a little worried but thought to each his own and not knowing the local dress code asked the geezer what attire would be appropriate.

The geezer answered: "Oh, that doesn't matter - it is just going to be me and you."

-- Bill P (porterwn@one.net), January 24, 2000.