Anybody Remember Martin Short on SNL as the Tobacco Industry Representative A few Years Back?

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I used to crack up at the character he played; the sweating, twitching, nervously-sucking-on-a-cigarette executive vehemently denying the accusing reporters' probing questions concerning the relationship with tobacco and cancer, and when faced with corroborative proof of their allegations, would suddenly about-face and exclaim, "I knew that! I knew that!!"
For some reason, this amusing scenario keeps returning to me as I watch the list of glitches and failure keep growing day by day.

-- Jay Urban (Jayho99@aol.com), January 06, 2000

Answers

What, more so than normal? Care to name one that effects you directly?

For extra credit, try and demonstrate how it will effect your heat, light, water, sewage treatment, telephone, fuel or parts for your car, or lead to a noticable loss of choice or volume on your supermarket's shelves. Partial credit will be given for problems that lead to a significant rise in the cost of your mortgage, utility bills, or other unavoidable expenses.

I was SO hoping that we'd take a couple of week's break from the groundless predictions and return in a calmer, more rational frame of mind. How optimistic.

-- Servant (public_service@yahoo.com), January 06, 2000.


I think the fact that my stool was incredibly loose the morning of 1 Jan definutley had something with Y2K. We can't keep dismissing all of these ominous signs. Beware.

-- Bob Dole (bdole@stiff.com), January 06, 2000.

Nathan Thurm

-- no (one@you.know), January 06, 2000.

Hey Bob, I've heard that oily discharge signals an imminent nuclear exchange with Russia and a rise in gold prices.

-- Rich (rubeliever@webtv.net), January 06, 2000.

I have it from a very reliable source that there are in fact Y2K related issues within Russia. Specifically, when they push the big red button that is supposed to launch the ICBM's, the microwave oven mysteriously turns itself on and when they attempt to re task their satellites, the garage door goes up. This is very scary stuff.

p.s. I woke up 1 Jan to find my member stiff as a board. Thank God my Viagra is Y2K compliant.

-- Bob Dole (bdole@stiff.com), January 06, 2000.



Jay,

I think that was his greatest characterization by far -- even better than Ed Grimley. And applying it to the execs -- whatta visual!

-- eve (123@4567.com), January 06, 2000.


[twitching]

"It's him, isn't it?" "Is it him, or me? It's him."

-- I knew that (ROFLM@ss.off), January 06, 2000.


"I'm not being defensive... you're the one being defensive. Why don't you ask yourself that question, hmm?"

-- Jay (havocuz@mindspring.com), January 06, 2000.

Thanks, Jay, for one of the two funniest visuals I've had from the forum this week.

The other was from "Satanta" on another thread. He's apparently a big-time doomer and just received his gas mask. He was so elated that he removed the filter and put the mask on when he went to sleep that night! I don't even care if this was tongue-in-cheek, to me it was an instant classic.

Now I'm curious -- when you're sleeping in a gas mask without the filter is there room left to suck your thumb?

-- eve (123@4567.com), January 06, 2000.


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