The lost "myths"

10. It is possible to repel Y2K marauders with a Mossberg 500 shotgun, a box of "00" shells and the movie, "Red Dawn."

9. If you accidently blow away the Avon lady, no one will care because the "system" will have collapsed.

8. Toilet paper (or the big phone book) will be more valuable than paper money after the rollover.

7. Having a basement full of food and water guarantees your post- Y2K survival. Hey, you can remove that nasty tumor with a sharp knife and a field manual.

6. The only useful post-Y2K skills will be subsistence farming, blacksmithing, animal doctorin' and mud wrestling.

5. The Dark Ages were really pretty swell... and the new Dark Ages will be even better.

4. After a few computers fail, everyone will forget how to build the technology of the 20th century. "Fire... good."

3. A social/economic meltdown will result in only the "good" people surviving and building a better society on the ashes.

2. "GI's" are really way smarter than everybody else... but they have kept this carefully hidden by disguising themselves as middle class white folks.

1. And myth number one... Y2K will be like the Great Depression, the Civil War and a really bad hair day combined.

Bonus myth: You will really use those 100,000 matches and ton of beans no matter what happens.

-- Ken Decker (kcdecker@worldnet.att.net), December 01, 1999

Answers

Hey Ken, two of my closest friends are, respectively, a blacksmith and a vet. Don't knock it 'til you've tried it. They probably wouldn't mind having a gander at this list. Which is indeed funny.

-- silver ion (gladtoknow@cademics.not), December 01, 1999.

Ken,

ROTFLMAO Just be careful where you use those matches after eating those beans. haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

-- (Polly@troll.com), December 01, 1999.

Decker, I can only come up with two reasons why you could possibly care if another informed adult spends discretionary funds (that would otherwise probably be wasted anyway) on matches. Either you are a paid shill or you are so psychologically fragile that your emotional underpinnings are severely threatened when you become aware of someone making different choices than you think they should. Which of these two is it, please?

Checks from the NSA don't bounce yet, do they?

www.y2ksafeminnesota.com

-- MinnesotaSmith (y2ksafeminnesota@hotmail.com), December 01, 1999.

Please don't feed the trolls.

-- (brett@miklos.org), December 01, 1999.

Corrected version of the lost "myths"

10. It is possible to repel Y2K marauders with a Mossberg 500 shotgun, a box of "00" shells and the movie, "Red Dawn."
You have a lot better chance than without those things.

9. If you accidently blow away the Avon lady, no one will care because the "system" will have collapsed.
If the "system" has collapsed, there won't be any Avon ladies ringing your bell.

8. Toilet paper (or the big phone book) will be more valuable than paper money after the rollover.
If the Federal Reserve is out of business, what is a Federal Reserve Note worth?

7. Having a basement full of food and water guarantees your post- Y2K survival. Hey, you can remove that nasty tumor with a sharp knife and a field manual.
Nothing guarantees your survival, now or later. However, you can improve your odds by preparation.

6. The only useful post-Y2K skills will be subsistence farming, blacksmithing, animal doctorin' and mud wrestling.
How about people doctorin', radio communications, and battery charging?

5. The Dark Ages were really pretty swell... and the new Dark Ages will be even better.
No, they were pretty bad, but some people survived anyway.

4. After a few computers fail, everyone will forget how to build the technology of the 20th century. "Fire... good."
They won't forget, but they won't be able to build, for example, integrated circuits. You need computers to build computers of the present day.

3. A social/economic meltdown will result in only the "good" people surviving and building a better society on the ashes.
Not the "good", but the "prepared". Personally, I think they are, on average, better than the "unprepared", but I may be wrong.

2. "GI's" are really way smarter than everybody else... but they have kept this carefully hidden by disguising themselves as middle class white folks.
You, on the other hand, are disguised as ... what?

1. And myth number one... Y2K will be like the Great Depression, the Civil War and a really bad hair day combined.
If we're really lucky, maybe.

Bonus myth: You will really use those 100,000 matches and ton of beans no matter what happens.
And I suppose you will use your fire insurance even if you don't have a fire?

-- Ken Decker (kcdecker@worldnet.att.net), December 01, 1999

-- Steve Heller (stheller@koyote.com), December 01, 1999.

Smith,

Did you miss the word "humor" in the tagline? In the word of the immortal Foghorn Leghorn, "It's a joke, son."

Second, I don't care how consenting adults spend their money. I defend your right to peddle your Y2K wares... and the right of those wracked with Y2K FUD to buy them. It ain't pretty, but it's America.

Now, what about that forum rule prohibiting Y2K vendors from hawking their wares here? Diane? (chuckle)

-- Ken Decker (kcdecker@worldnet.att.net), December 01, 1999.

Steve...

May I use your picture for the animated version of the "Lost Myths?"

-- Ken Decker (kcdecker@worldnet.att.net), December 01, 1999.

Can we nominate MIss Myth to be the honorary poster bearer of this thread?

-- What Me Worry, Madison Ave. NY (whowhatwhere@when.how), December 01, 1999.

Okay, if you want to use my picture, go ahead.

-- Steve Heller (stheller@koyote.com), December 01, 1999.

Decker, all potential clients for my business live in Minnesota or very close to it. The vast majority of the people in that area, and everyone living outside it are not prospects. For anyone who is not a prospective client, my website is nothing but a collection of free information. My mentioning my site ends up serving virtually exclusively to point out the latter. You brought up the commercial aspect of my site in this thread, not me.

BTW, have you picked out the country you will try to flee to once the inevitable post-Y2K Nuremberg-style trials begin for pollyanna politicians/managers and their fellow-traveler shill sidekicks? You have too much demonstrated intelligence IMO to simply be able to resort to the defense when needed of being uninformed or simple- minded, leaving only a darker, more-likely-to-be-deemed-unforgivable conclusion about your motivations...

www.y2ksafeminnesota.com

-- MinnesotaSmith (y2ksafeminnesota@hotmail.com), December 01, 1999.

Ya Hey,

Minnesota Smith has a point der hey don't ya know? Inso hey?

-- (Polly@troll.com), December 01, 1999.

Smith,

Of course, you completely ignore my point. I'm OK with you participating in the market economy. No matter how overpriced or useless your goods and services... you have an economic right to enter the marketplace. If you want to claim your web site is purely a public service, I suggest you use a "dot org" name. File as a nonprofit corporation and save yourself some taxes. It not, just admit the web site is a commercial venture and spare me the altruism defense.

As for fleeing the country, I have no need... nor will I after rollover. I'm more worried about an invasion of alien pod people than of "Nuremberg-style trials." (laughter) While I imagine this is a favorite fantasy of yours, Smith, it ain't gonna happen.

And the gov't shill suggestion is pretty tired... though utterly predictable. While it may be difficult for you to appreciate, a reasonable, rational person can reach the conclusion Y2K will not result in the end of the world... and that your services are useless as the proverbial teats on a boar hog.

-- Ken Decker (kcdecker@worldnet.att.net), December 01, 1999.