I'm wondering how a squirrel turns off the power. We have had several power outages in the are recently. Each time it is blamed on squirrels. Do the squirrels carry little tool boxes with them and sabotage the power plants...or what?

-- (Ohms@zap.com), September 30, 1999

Answers

Yeah, shouldn't we be preparing for a 3-5 day squirrel attack?

-- CygnusXI (noburnt@toast.net), September 30, 1999.

Squirrels walk on power-lines and create a "short-circuit" with their bodies. Generally on power-poles there are cables for all three "phases" which come from the generating plants, plus ground. If the squirrel touches more than 1 cable at a time - POOF!

-- Anonymous999 (Anonymous999@Anonymous999.xxx), September 30, 1999.

Squirrels are the original semi-conductors and quite good at finding large voltage potentials that exist between two points (A & B) at a given substation. This habit was also the inspiration for "Meals - Ready to Eat" (MREs).

-- Arnie Rimmer (Arnie_Rimmer@usa.net), September 30, 1999.

And if it's a wet squirrel, all hell breaks loose. Although, it does recieve the ultimate blow-dry!

:)

-- Will continue (farming@home.com), September 30, 1999.

Good grief Arnie. That reminds me of my Uncle's comment for every road kill we'd pass as being a 'hot meal'.

-- Will continue (farming@home.com), September 30, 1999.

I'm wondering how a squirrel turns off the power. We have had several power outages in the are recently. Each time it is blamed on squirrels. Do the squirrels carry little tool boxes with them and sabotage the power plants...or what?

They aren't really squirrels.. that is just their cover. They are really Russian-trained minks. Kamikazi minks. Be afraid, be very afraid.

-- Linda (lwmb@psln.com), September 30, 1999.

He flips the switch!! HA! HA! HA! HA!

How do you keep an elephant from charging?

You take his credit cards away!!

Cool Handle dude!

-- todays Tom Sawyer (RUSH@2112.rockon!), September 30, 1999.

My Bretheren have united from around the world to throw off the oppressive yolk of the Furless Ape-Monkey Men! Even now, brave freedom loving squirrels and rodents fromn all walks of life have bonded together and sacificed themselves to further our Great Cause!!! We will dominate!! We will Succeed!! Long Live the Rodent Revolution!!!

-- The Squirrel King (I'mstillNuts@upa.tree), September 30, 1999.

Due to the escalating number of doomers hoarding grains and other tasty food stuffs squirrels, who have discoverd these hoards, have been profilerating at an unprecidented rate. Individuals finding such squirrels in their food stuffs have been on hunting rampages chasing the little critters causing panic among their population resulting in widespread chaos as they move to higher ground, which is unfortunately the power poles. This has resulted in an increasing number of power outages. If this tred continues their may be more and more outages after the first of the year as squirrels are routed out from their hibernation.

Do not store any food as this will only exacerbate the problem. As a further note from the auther squirrels find paper money as the preferred lining of their nests so please leave your money in the bank where it will be safe.

-- Stacia (ClassyCwgl@aol.com), September 30, 1999.

Let's not forget those dirty rats that turn the power too....ooooo,oooo, you dirty rat.

-- Rat Fink (ratfink@ratfinkk.xcom), September 30, 1999.

The squirrel brigade is the secret terrorist arm of Ben Laid. Highly classified, and you are not supposed to notice.

-- sssshhhhhhhh (squeak@acorn.hoard), September 30, 1999.

This story reminds me of the squirrel that our company adopted several years ago. While out on a air conditioning service call at a local apartment complex, I came across our "little buddy" holed up in a service disconnect for one of the buildings. It seems that the exterior cover of the disconnect had swung partially open, and remained in a fixed position due to rust. There inside the box, was the little guy, snug as a bug in a rug! He doesn't get out very often though, and we're afraid he doesn't get much to eat. And whenever we go back to check up on him...he always has that same "suprised" expression on his face. I wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that he's forever stuck in that same silly position...straddling the fuse block!

-- TM (mercier7@pdnt.com), September 30, 1999.

TM, he may be cute, but remember: a squirrel is nothing but a rat with a bushy tail.

-- King of Spain (madrid@aol.cum), September 30, 1999.

How's that ole squirrel theme song go?

"He lights up my life....

-- Robert A. Cook, PE (Marietta, GA) (cook.r@csaatl.com), September 30, 1999.

Are the squirrels in league with the stealth geese?

-- yerfdog (not@real.com), September 30, 1999.

Ever seen squirrels mudwrestle?

-- J (jart5@bellsouth.net), September 30, 1999.

What a bunch of nuts......

-- Will continue (farming@home.com), September 30, 1999.

Squirrel King,

It warms the cockles of my stoney little heart to see evidence that you, as well as our other monarch KoS, are progressing along as fellow devotees of the Robert Cook school of spelling...

"oppressive yolk", - couldn't have put it better myself.

Eat your heart out Vanna White!

-- flora (***@__._), September 30, 1999.

HOW DOES A SQUIRREL TURN OF THE POWER??

Easily.

Diane

Electricity Power Out--A Dead Squirrel Teaches Y2K Lessons In Fragility & Connectedness

http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 0012gP

-- Diane J. Squire (sacredspaces@yahoo.com), September 30, 1999.

This entire thread is making me feel VERY squirrel-y (groans from behind the computer: DAAAAAAAADDDDDDD!)

-- BigDog (BigDog@duffer.com), September 30, 1999.

Arnie, Will Continue,

And here I thought they were just "Crispy Critters"!

Always did feel kind of morbid eating those for breakfast. : )

-- Wilferd (WilferdW@aol.com), September 30, 1999.

Invasion of Electrically Curious Squirrels! Bushy Cover-Up Exposed!

-- scamper (around@the.issue), September 30, 1999.

I don't believe that all of these power outages are caused by squirrels. There was another one in Oregon yesterday that they say was caused by a squirrel and the power was out for 5 or 6 hours. How can a squirrel do that much damage.

I think a lot of these are pre-planned shutdowns that I predicted about a year ago, so that they can change embedded systems and do Y2K testing. The management of the utility probably keeps a box of burned squirrels stored away. When the media comes around asking questions they just pull one out and say "See, here's the unlucky little culprit"!

-- @ (@@@.@), September 30, 1999.

Tis' Death I see for the Vast Horde of Hairless Ape-Man Humanity! Surrender Now!! Before final blackout...My Loyal followers are as we speak, strategically emplacing themselves on high tension towers. Cease oppressing my Rodent Revolution, or taste the bittersweet consequences!!!Long Live the Rodent Revolution

-- The Squirrel King (still Nuts@upina.tree), September 30, 1999.

@@@@@,

I agree with you. I think the outages are preplanned. They all seem to last about two hours. This has been going on for months here, and has never happened this much before.

Lot of power flashing on and off too. Would that be while the squirrel is dancing the electrocution dance on the line?

-- (Ohms@zap.com), September 30, 1999.

No, that's not true. Everytime the power goes out my neighbor finds another fried squirrel near an electric source in her yard.

-- Amy Leone (leoneamy@aol.com), September 30, 1999.

Amy,

You've got to be kidding. EVERY time the power goes out it is because of the SAME neighbor? What is she doing, putting bait near the wires? I have to assume that you are being sarcastic, or grossly exaggerating

-- @ (@@@.@), September 30, 1999.

LOL!! :) :) ROTFLMAO !!!!!!

This thread is GREAT!!! Just what I need today...thanks all, I will definetly print this out :)

-- Brent James Bushardt (brentj@webt.com), September 30, 1999.

Just remember, the Squirrel King knows who you are --- all of you.

-- Tom Carey (tomcarey@mindspring.com), October 01, 1999.

You don't have to bait the squirrels. They're not that bright. Sad, but true. They seem to think that power lines are their own little expressways.

I could easily be Amy's neighbor. I have the transformer for 17 homes in my yard... Plenty of fried squirrel around here, too. The neighborhood cats seems to enjoy a fresh one, though.

-- yerfdog (not@real.com), October 01, 1999.

"box of burned squirrels". Yup, that sounds like management.

-- bw (home@puget.sound), October 01, 1999.

Ya know, it's funny, but I've never seen the same squirrel turn off the power twice......

But then again, lightening never strikes the same place twice - because the same place isn't there the second time.

-- Robert A. Cook, PE (Marietta, GA) (cook.r@csaatl.com), October 01, 1999.