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A BEAUTIFUL BEDTIME STORY:
Once upon a time there was a fair land called Bubble.com. In this fair land the rain suddenly stopped falling, at first for a week, then for a month, then for several months in a row. The citizens of Bubble.com stopped carrying their umbrellas to work with them, since even when it became very cloudy, not a drop fell from the skies. After one year of no rain, the umbrella manufacturers mostly shut down, since people stopped buying umbrellas. After five years of no rain, architects began to design houses with no roofs. These houses became very popular, since they were so much brighter and more airy than the other kind, and they were soon built in large quantities. Meanwhile the houses built to withstand strong storms could be had for a song, since their design was considered ridiculously gloomy, and those who would live in them were considered especially foolish. A few people who continued to live in these mostly gold-colored storm houses complained of a conspiracy, as their property values fell and their neighbors fled for the roofless wonders. Far and wide, all proclaimed that we were in a new era, when rain had been abolished from on high. Special temples were constructed in devotion to the sun god, known as on-line brokerage offices. The priests of these temples were revered as all-knowing and all-wise. Soon those architects who built houses with roofs could hardly be found, since their craft had become forgotten, and their services not needed. Entire neighborhoods of roofed houses were razed to make way for the modern "internet" style. Then one fine day, the clouds rolled in, lower, thicker, and more menacing than had been seen in 25 years. A few old timers proclaimed that it might rain again, but they were dismissed as cranky fools. Then a few light drops fell, then a steady rain, then a torrent, then a flood. The panicked residents of Bubble.com fled for the storm houses, willing to pay any price for shelter. Even those roofless houses that had been built in luxurious comfort, and were barely a few months old, were quickly abandoned in a panic. Those who decided to brave the storm, figuring it to be a brief passing event, were quickly disillusioned when dozens of storms followed over the next few years, some of them absolutely devastating in their impact. As for those who remained in their storm houses during the era of no rain, they lived very happily, and wealthily, ever after. As with any children's story, we won't be so crude as to mention what happened to the others.
By Jon Kaplan
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Won't be long now
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Paul Milne
"If you live within 5 miles of a 7-11, you're toast"
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