OT: humor, necessary measures for curbing the corporate crime wave

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NECESSARY MEASURES FOR CURBING THE CORPORATE CRIME WAVE

1. The stockholders and management of corporations convicted of felonies should lose their right to vote and run for public office.

2. A registry should be maintained in each area of criminal corporations, and any corporation convicted of a felony should be required to register with the local police. A notice should be sent to all of their neighbors that a criminal corporation is taking up residence in their locality.

3. Criminal corporations should lose all corporate welfare benefits and government contracts.

4. Criminal corporations should be required to make weekly visits to parole officers, and their stockholders and management should be subject to random drug tests (either urine or hair).

5. Criminal corporaions should not be allowed to operate within 500 yards of a school, church, or library.

6. Criminal corporations should be required to place the phrase "A criminal corporation" on all advertising, signs, and vehicles as a public warning.

7. If criminal corporations violate the terms of their parole, their stockholders and officers should go to jail.

8. In addition to the fine on the corporation, the personal assets of stockholders should be forfeited for their criminal negligence and lack of oversight.

9. The increasing number of lawless corporations calls for stricter penalties. BRING BACK THE DEATH PENALTY FOR CRIMINAL CORPORATIONS! In this context, the 'death penalty' is the closure of the corporation, the forfeiture of its assets to its victims and/or the government, and the winding up of its affairs by a court appointed receiver.

10. Stockholders and management should be required to wear monitoring bracelets for the duration of their parole, and may not travel outside of their jurisdiction without a written pass from their parole officer.

11. The Stockholders and Management and Security Guards of corporations convicted of a felony shall be forbidden to carry a firearm.

12. The Stockholders and Management of corporations convicted of felonies shall not associate with the Stockholders and Management of other corporate felons.

13. Corporations convicted of a third felony shall have their corporate headquarters and management relocated to Moscow for life.

Robert Waldrop, with items 11 - 13 contributed by a member of the Sojourners-list Archbishop Oscar Romero Catholic Worker House, Oklahoma City Holy Mary, Mother of God, help the helpless, strengthen the fearful, comfort the sorrowful, bring justice to the poor and peace to all nations. Amen. http://www.justpeace.org Opus Justitiae Pax!

-- robert waldrop (rmwj@soonernet.com), September 10, 1999

Answers

What humor? I like it! Corporations exist as a seperate entity from the people who run it. Why shouldn't that "entity" be subject to the same laws and regulations, as everyone else?

-- Bokonon (bok0non@my-Deja.com), September 10, 1999.

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