Some very old remedies (humor)

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Here's a file saved from a Yorkshire culture news group: The following are a collection of original recipes, hints and remedies. I give no guarentee that the ingredients for the remedies are still available, or even if they could be legally purchased!!! [And please note Old Git provides these recipes merely for amusement.] COUGH MIXTURE #1 : 2 drachms peppermint

2 drachms aniseed

2 drachms Laudanum

2 drachms ether

1/2 lb.black treacle, scalded with a pint of water. Cool treacle/water mix and then add drugs. Dose : 1 tbsp. 3 times a day. COUGH MIXTURE #2 2 oz. cod liver oil

2oz. glycerine

2oz.honey

Juice of 3 lemons Dose : children - 1 tsp., adults - 1 dessertspoon CHILDREN'S COUGH MIXTURE : 1 small teacup of black treacle. Add a piece of 'FRESH' butter, about the size of 1/2 a hen's egg. Add 3 tsp. Demarara sugar, 1 tsp. olive oil and 2 tbsp.best vinegar. Keep warm beside the fire and give 1 tsp. before bed time. CURE FOR COLD : 5lb. elderberries simmered with 1 lb.white sugar. Strain. 1 tbsp. in hot water will cure the most stubborn cold. ECZEMA : In a quart bottle, put the strained juice of 3 lemons, 2oz.Epsom salts and 3 tbsp.of pure liquid honey. Fill up bottle, with hot water. Drink a wine glass full 3 times a day (!) HAIR TONIC :

1 oz.spirit of turpentine, 1 oz. Trotter's oil, 30 drops of acetic solution of cantharides Apply a little to the roots of the hair 2 - 3 times aweek. FOR WIND AT HEART : 2 drachms Sal volatile, 2 drachms Tincture of gentian, 2 drachm Chloric Ether Fill medicene bottle with above ingredients and fill up with water. Dose : 2 tbsp. when required. CONSTIPATION : 1lb.prunes, 1/2lb.Demarara sugar, 2 oz. powdered senna, 1 oz. powdered ginger, 2 tbsp. Brandy Stew prunes in a very little water until soft, sieve. Add sugar while hot and when cold, add other ingredients. Mix thoroughly. * No dose given...please proceed with caution! GREEN OINTMENT (for sores,cuts & burns) : 4 penny tin of eucalyptus, 2 penny tin of vaseline, 3 pennyworth of oil of swallow, 1/4 oz. shredded bees wax Put all in a jar, stand in boiling water on fire. Stir with wooden spoon until dissolved. Put in small pots & jars. SORE THROATS & COUGHS (also makes a nice salad dressing!!) : Warm 6oz.of pure honey until it liquifies, then stir into 6oz.white wine vinegar. Put in wide mouthed bottle and cork well. ACHES & PAINS : 4 oz. paraffin, 4 oz. methylated spirits, 4 oz. white wine vinegar (from chemist cost 8d), 1 oz. camphor, 2 egg whites Mix together, shake well . Rub sore spots. EMBROCATION : 2 oz. olive oil, 1 oz. oil of amber, 1 drachm oil of cloves To be mixed together and rubbed on the chest at bedtime. RHEUMATISM : 2 oz. flowers of sulpha, 2 oz. epsom salts, 2 oz. citrate of magnesium, 1 oz. ginger Take a tsp. in a glass of milk. (My favorite recipe!!) INFLUENZA MIXTURE : 1/2 oz paragoric, 1/2 oz sweet nitre, 1/4 oz Sal Volatile, 1/4 oz Spirits of chloroform, 1/2 oz syrup of squills Make up to 16 oz. with water. Dose : 1 tbsp. 3 times a day. Now, if anyone could tell me what 'syrup of squills' might be..??????

End cut and paste.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), April 04, 1999

Answers

From the Oxford Dictionary.

SQUILL,n.Plant of the Lily family;its bulb,used as a diuretic,purgative etc.also a crustacean(f.L.squillaf.Gk.skilla.)

-- Chris (griffen@globalnet.co.uk), April 04, 1999.


Dammit! Sorry about the screwed up format, cut and paste job. That'll teach me. Thanks for the squill info, Chris. I think I'll just stockpile as many meds as I can. . .

COUGH MIXTURE #1:

2 drachms peppermint, 2 drachms aniseed, 2 drachms Laudanum, 2 drachms ether, 1/2 lb.black treacle, scalded with a pint of water. Cool treacle/water mix and then add drugs. Dose: 1 tbsp. 3 times a day.

COUGH MIXTURE #2:

2 oz. cod liver oil, 2oz. glycerine, 2oz.honey, Juice of 3 lemons. Dose: children - 1 tsp., adults - 1 dessertspoon

CHILDREN'S COUGH MIXTURE:

1 small teacup of black treacle. Add a piece of 'FRESH' butter, about the size of 1/2 a hen's egg. Add 3 tsp. Demarara sugar, 1 tsp. olive oil and 2 tbsp.best vinegar. Keep warm beside the fire and give 1 tsp. before bed time.

CURE FOR COLD:

5lb. elderberries simmered with 1 lb.white sugar. Strain. 1 tbsp. in hot water will cure the most stubborn cold. E

ECZEMA:

In a quart bottle, put the strained juice of 3 lemons, 2oz.Epsom salts and 3 tbsp.of pure liquid honey. Fill up bottle, with hot water. Drink a wine glass full 3 times a day (!)

HAIR TONIC:

1 oz.spirit of turpentine, 1 oz. Trotter's oil, 30 drops of acetic solution of cantharides Apply a little to the roots of the hair 2 - 3 times aweek.

FOR WIND AT HEART:

2 drachms Sal volatile, 2 drachms Tincture of gentian, 2 drachm Chloric Ether Fill medicene bottle with above ingredients and fill up with water. Dose : 2 tbsp. when required.

CONSTIPATION:

1lb.prunes, 1/2lb.Demarara sugar, 2 oz. powdered senna, 1 oz. powdered ginger, 2 tbsp. Brandy Stew prunes in a very little water until soft, sieve. Add sugar while hot and when cold, add other ingredients. Mix thoroughly. *No dose given...please proceed with caution!

GREEN OINTMENT (for sores,cuts & burns):

4 penny tin of eucalyptus, 2 penny tin of vaseline, 3 pennyworth of oil of swallow, 1/4 oz. shredded bees wax Put all in a jar, stand in boiling water on fire. Stir with wooden spoon until dissolved. Put in small pots & jars.

SORE THROATS & COUGHS (also makes a nice salad dressing!!):

Warm 6oz.of pure honey until it liquifies, then stir into 6oz.white wine vinegar. Put in wide mouthed bottle and cork well.

ACHES & PAINS:

4 oz. paraffin, 4 oz. methylated spirits, 4 oz. white wine vinegar (from chemist cost 8d), 1 oz. camphor, 2 egg whites Mix together, shake well . Rub sore spots.

EMBROCATION:

2 oz. olive oil, 1 oz. oil of amber, 1 drachm oil of cloves To be mixed together and rubbed on the chest at bedtime.

RHEUMATISM:

2 oz. flowers of sulpha, 2 oz. epsom salts, 2 oz. citrate of magnesium, 1 oz. ginger Take a tsp. in a glass of milk.

INFLUENZA MIXTURE:

1/2 oz paragoric, 1/2 oz sweet nitre, 1/4 oz Sal Volatile, 1/4 oz Spirits of chloroform, 1/2 oz syrup of squills Make up to 16 oz. with water. Dose : 1 tbsp. 3 times a day.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), April 04, 1999.


Hey Old Git! Gotta recipe for home-made valium? We all might need some at some point! :)

-- FM (vidprof@aol.com), April 04, 1999.

Herbal Valium

One bud Marijuana

Apply flame

Inhale as needed

-- Bud (bud@normal.org_), April 04, 1999.


No home-made Valium recepies, but Granny Clampett's Rhuemetiz Medicine and Cure-All Elixer if taken in quantity, will surely calm you down if not make you downright catatonic.

WW

-- Wildweasel (vtmldm@epix.net), April 04, 1999.



When I was a kid my mother made me eat a small does of molasses and sulphur every spring for some supposed ailment it was sure to ward off. Even worse was a large teaspoon of lard, to keep me from getting boils. When I reminded her I'd never had a boil in my life, she said, "That's because I make you eat the lard." Catch--22.

-- gilda jessie (jess@listbot.com), April 04, 1999.

Hey, Ol' Git....I can just see you rendering out the swallows for their lard. Maybe their tongues on toast would be equal to hummingbird's tongues? I mean we are going to HAVE TO sacrifice next year.....right??

Got Crisco???

-- Taz (Tassie@aol.com), April 04, 1999.


Where is the laudanum when you really need it, eh? Hey doctors in the US can't even prescribe adequate dosages for terminal patients in pain. Give me the days of the old apothecaries.

-- Donna Barthuley (moment@pacbell.net), April 04, 1999.

Well, if that (cough remedy)don't kill you, it oughta cure you!

Anybody remember being given castor oil every day? Ugh! But for coughs I just got sugar and butter mixed,not so bad.

-- sue (deco100@aol.com), April 05, 1999.


Sue, I escaped castor oil, but not cod liver oil. Donna, I couldn't have raised my colicky son without Paragoric (sp). It's probably illegal now.

-- gilda jessie (jess@listbot.com), April 05, 1999.


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