There was a thread recently on getting fit prior to rollover as a) a way of getting fit! and b) the necessity to be fit to handle the mental and perhaps physical trauma we may all suffer if TSHT proverbial F.

To this end I've sold my sports car and am cycling to and from work on a nice Cannondale mountain bike. I'm also hitting the gym as often as I can and after about four weeks of this I'm feeling and looking a lot better :)

Which brings me on to my main subject - bicycles. The lates CIA report just made available lists as a high possibility disruptions in shipping of petroleum products from the middle east. Do any of you remember the gas crisis of 1973? - long lines at gas stations, rationing, occasional non-drive-by shootings (no gas!) at petrol stations - to this end it wouldn'y hurt any of you that already don't own one to buy a bike now. You may have a real need for one in January 2000 if (when) gas rationing is introduced.

So buy a bike NOW, don't wait 'till the end of the year. I'm ordering a high end titanium mountain bike and will keep my other as a spare or to posibly barter with. I'm also gonna stock up on tyres and tubes, lube, chains etc.

Do any of you remember the Northridge quake a couple of years ago in LA.? I was there at the time, actually got thrown out of my bed by it at 3.30am and I was nowhere near the epicentre!, anyhow after the quake a lot of roads and traffic lights were down. Consequently the next day, and for months afterwards, traffic conditions were horrendous with 1 hour commutes turning into amazon-like expeditions... People started buying motorcycles, dealers sold out in days, bicycles were brought out of garages and dusted off. Motorcycles were trading at a premium with nothing to be found in the classifieds.

I think the same thing will happen in 2000, just something to think about.

Later,

Andy

-- Andy (2000EOD@prodigy.net), February 24, 1999

Answers

Great thinking about bikes being a good bartering item. This family of four has a bike each with two spares. We do need to stock up on tires, inner tubes, repair kits, chains, lubes, and brake pads, pumps, etc. That's one thing I've been meaning to get to but just haven't got around to it yet. Must truck on down to the local bike shop and get that list seen too.

Many thanx for the nudge.

-- Gary (fisher@thepeddle.com), February 25, 1999.

Andy,

That titanium mountain bike sounds pretty spiffy! But, I' kinda partial to my three-wheeled "geezer's bike" Got a great big basket on the back to haul little piggies to the market, and bring home the bacon, figuratively speaking.

And with the little bell, it makes me look downright dottery and harmless (can you believe it!)

But I gotta tell ya, it aint worth a damn at attractin' the ladies. On second thought, just how much are them titanium jobs, anyway?

-- Lon Frank (postit@here.com), February 25, 1999.

ITSHTF, I don't see myself biking anywhere. Hell, I have nightmares from my childhood days when the neighborhood bullies would push me off my bike and start doing wheelies and ramming it into the wall. I've suffered terrible with those memories. Besides, I think those bicycle seats aren't meant to be ridden on. Men coming down with testicular cancer, low sperm count, enlarged penis (well maybe that one isn't so bad). And women experiencing more incidents of yeast infections, and bladder infections! Not to mention torn ligaments, leg cramps, back and neck injuries, vehicular accidents, and head injuries. I think I'm going to stick with Mollie, she's an old grey mare and she's all that she can be.

-- indianmade (indianmaid@notsore.com), February 25, 1999.

Forgot one more item....Oh my hemmies! (Bicycling is bad on the hemmies).

-- indianmade (indianmade@notsore.com), February 25, 1999.

"Men coming down with testicular cancer, low sperm count, enlarged penis... "

Damn, and I thought it was the titanium that titilated the ladies.

Anyway, I don't have to worry about that (yeah, like I was worried) because my old geezer's bike has a big ol' fluffy seat, that just matches my big ol'...wait a minute, this aint commin' out just right. Anyway, let's just say it's posterierly ergonomically designed!

-- Lon Frank (postit@here.com), February 25, 1999.

And oh yea, I forgot one more thing, it gives you a big fat ass!

-- indianemade (indianmade@notsore.com), February 25, 1999.

Really Indianmade, (Indianemade?, maid?)

Is that what you got. Shoot, all they gave me was the free bell. I'm gonna go back and tell em' that I want a big fat ass, too. Maybe I can keep it in the pasture where you keep yours and Molly the grey mare? :)

-- Lon Frank (postit@here.com), February 25, 1999.

Hey - LOL! - good stuff guys, the titanium job is around 3k if I buy a Chinese-made frame (Airborne) or 4-5K if US made. Could buy a lot of gold eagles with this money but seeing as I've sold my car I thought I'd treat myself. If TSHTF yes, people will try and steal the bike - can you say bike-jacking? They'll have to deal with my bodyguard, Mr. Glock, first :)

If I had the money I'd buy a few heavy duty Schwinns to barter with.

Andy

(Checked down below and it looks about the same size, Hmmmm, quite a beneficial side effect though :) )

-- Andy (2000EOD@prodigy.net), February 25, 1999.

Andy, when you checked down below, were you looking in the front or the back? :)

3 K !!! K as in THOUSAND!!! DOLLARS????!!!! Holey moley, I think I'll go wash the geezer bike right now. I knew I liked it better than any old titanium job. Hell, I might even give it a name, and start keeping it in the shed.

Years and years ago I rode a Pugeot 10 speed, and beleive me, it could fly. But three thousand (or more)?

Somebody get me my pills!

-- Lon Frank (postit@here.com), February 25, 1999.

Three thousand dollars? For that you can buy a decent, functional motorcycle - a little old Japanese bike - and some spares and tools, and about 2000 gallons of gas.

At 50 mpg (a conservative estimate) and 50 miles per day everyday (say I'm commuting to a job) that'll last...um... until someone starts making fuel alcohol.

But you'd have to have somewhere to store all that fuel.

- Got a tank truck?

Y2kbiker, who is looking for a British trail bike

-- y2kbiker (y2kbiker@bellatlantic.net), February 25, 1999.

Picked up a nice sturdy used Huffy mountain bike a month or so ago, as well as extra tubes, tires etc. I'm now looking for a little used 150 or 250cc single cylinder enduro motorcycle. They are street legal, but you can use them to go have some fun in the dirt too. They'll get about 100 mpg, and beats the hell outta pedaling. I've owned motorcycles all my life, until I moved to Florida. I would be terrified to ride one here - I've never seen worse drivers in my life. But, if there were a lot less cars on the road........

-- Online2Much (ready_for_y2k@mindspring.com), February 25, 1999.

Too bad you can't take a joke Lonnie, I'll race you with my Harley, and I'll leave Mollie where she's at......

-- indianmade (indianmade@notsore.com), February 25, 1999.

Oh, come on indiadmade, didn't you see my smiley-face thing. (yea, yea, I know it looks like a dog walking backwards, but it's the best resemblance I can do.) Anyway, that's like a Kings X, you know. And besides you said you were notsore.

Anyway, you started it.

Did not. Did too. Did not! Did too! Did too! Did too! Did not! Didnotdidnotddidnot! You, you b b big... buthead!

Oh oh. Was that your mom, or mine. We better go, see you later.

:) <---see, smiley face thing

-- Lon Frank (postit@here.com), February 25, 1999.

Does anyone know where I can buy an old geezer 3 wheeler?

-- anonymous (Goldblatt2897@white-marsh.aim-smart.com), February 25, 1999.

Sure, they're made by the Old Poop Cycle Company, which happens to be right do here close to Geezerville-on-the-Bayou. Just send me, (uh how much do you have, anyway) about three grand, more or less, and I'll get you one.

Otherwise, try a big city bike shop, and ask for an "adult's tricycle" or a bike for he hadidcapped. I originally got one for my Down Syndrome kid, but he won't be caught anywhere near it. Seems he figured out the thing about not being attractive to the ladies, long before I did.

-- Lon Frank (postit@here.com), February 25, 1999.

Hi all:

Here in Tucson we have a community bike center. I'll be visiting soon since my mountain bike was stolen from inside my house during a house party. I should have locked it. I didn't think anyone would pull such a heinous act, and was busy tweaking the DJ's turntables for the positive vibe that was later as everyone settled in and began dancing to the finest electro, progressive, techno, trance, and drum&bass coming from the booming speakers.

Before I get off track here, the community bike center is a great place for anyone needing a bike. They have a remarkable apprenticeship program where one can earn a bike while learning the zen art of bike mechanics. I think we can agree that this would be a very necessary skill in the future. Many of these bikes are donated to the citizens of Mexico and lower income folks in the city. This center also sponsors the "Community Bike Ride" every month. This idea sends a message that bikes are a viable form of transportation. Each month, the streets of San Francisco get so crowded with bikes, the cop shops are without power. The message sent is to get out of your $25,000 steel boxed sports futility vehicle, enjoy the light breeze, get some exercise, and help reduce the brown haze of pollution over most American cities.

Indianmade: Unless you are a Tour De' France Junkie and ride more then 20,000 miles per year, you don't have to worry about low sperm count.

-MC

-- MC Davey (Apus1Son@aol.com), February 25, 1999.

Bikes as barter items have been mentioned many times before on various threads....

When the weather isn't so good, I guess you can obviously get a stationary bike -- or, my own personal preference, the jump rope. (Works for me.)

-- Jack (jsprat@eld.net), February 25, 1999.

I like the idea of bicycles but I agree that in most circumstances those seats are just not healthy. Imagine sitting on one at work all day and think about how your nether regions would hate you for it. I weigh about 180 and the idea of balancing all that on six square inches of anything is just not appealing. Do you really want to damage those areas after practical madical help is available?

Since I'm not too fond of making animals into modes of transport then that leaves me with what God gave me. Two feet that never need lube jobs or new tires.

Just my .02

-- (Lancelot @ tavern link.com), February 25, 1999.

Ok...where are you planning to go on these bikes??? Wal-Mart???

-- rooster (logcabin@loggie.com), February 25, 1999.

There is already a shortage of good used girl's bicycle seats!

-- Uncle di de (x@x.net), February 25, 1999.

In your nabe no doubt Uncle... :)

-- Andy (2000EOD@prodigy.net), February 25, 1999.

Great Thread, needed the "comic relief." :-)

One thought. My Mom once asked me, "Why don't they put seats on bikes like they do on tractors? It sure would make it more comfortable to ride with a keister like mine." :):):):):):)

Wishing for a "more comfortable" seat :-)

Merlin.

-- Merlin Emery (MerlinEmery@yahoo.com), February 25, 1999.

As discussed earlier, WIDE seats are available. You don't have to bruise your posterior region with a narrow wedge. Buy a WIDE seat to provide relief. I have an extra one for my Schwinn Heavy Duti in case Y2K screws up the parts supply line.

-- dinosaur (dinosaur@williams-net.com), February 26, 1999.

Okay, this is serious now...what about afixing a toilet seat some how to the bike? I mean if you can sit on a toilet seat and not hurt yourself, why can't you put one on a bike? Kisses and smiles, Lon...

-- indianmade (indianmade@notsore.com), February 26, 1999.

Gawsh, Indianmade, right here in front of ever'body!

Did you hear the circus is in town? They got clowns and cotton candy and Spam on a stick. And I hear they may be lookin' for someone to ride one a them murdercycles in a cage. (got a summer job?)

-- Lon Frank (postit@here.com), February 26, 1999.

Personally.

I want one of the mountain bikes with the solar powered "Zap" thingy that helps you get over the steep spots. (You can find it the the Real Goods catalog).

Got cush?

Diane

-- Diane J. Squire (sacredspaces@yahoo.com), February 26, 1999.

Sorry I was gone for so long. Fell off my toilet seat and hurt myself again. Dang, it sounded like such a good idea, too! :)

Indianmade, I looked for you over at the circus last night. Maybe we can get Diane to give us some more free passes. She's the Fortune Teller and part-time Tattooed Lady.

-- Lon Frank (postit@here.com), February 26, 1999.