Furbys Banned From NSA National Security Agency -- Threat To National Security

Y2K Time Out.

Figured we could all use a chuckle. -- Diane

http://www.mercurycenter.com/breaking/docs/008742.htm

Posted at 6:36 a.m. PST Wednesday, January 13, 1999

Spy agency bans cybertoy from premises

WASHINGTON (AP) -- Warning: Furbys could be a threat to national security.

The National Security Agency has banned the popular mechanical pets from its Fort Meade premises in Maryland. In an internal message to workers, the NSA issued a warning about the toy, which is embedded with a computer chip that allows it to utter 200 words -- 100 in English and 100 in ``Furbish.''

``Personally owned photographic, video and audio recording equipment are prohibited items. This includes toys, such as 'Furbys,' with built-in recorders that repeat the audio with synthesized sound to mimic the original signal,'' the Furby Alert read, according to today's editions of The Washington Post.

``We are prohibited from introducing these items into NSA spaces. Those who have should contact their Staff Security Office for guidance.''

The Furby resembles an owl, with tufts of hair between its huge pink ears.

Because of its ability to repeat some of what it hears, NSA officials were worried ``that people would take them home and they'd start talking classified,'' one Capitol Hill source told the Post.

-- Diane J. Squire (sacredspaces@yahoo.com), January 13, 1999

Answers

Kinda like the Israel American spy (Pollard?) who may not be released because he knows too much? Couldn't NSA just warehouse the Furby intruders until 1/1/00 and then let them speak gibberish.

-- Brooks (brooksbie@hotmail.com), January 13, 1999.

Brooks: It is because they speak gibberish that they cannot be allowed, since their gibberish would be indistinguishable from the NSA gibberish, or any other govern-mental branch.

Diane: ROFL. So, should we be on the lookout for a "Know Your Furby" proposal soon? Or stealth Furbys? How about if we duct-tape their beaks closed? Is their a Furby Resistance Group in the works? Are they capable of eating anything ? Fruitcake?

-- Rob Michaels (sonofdust@net.com), January 13, 1999.

What does ROFL mean?

-- gilda jessie (jess@listbot.com), January 13, 1999.

Even Furbys know more about what is going on than we do.

-- Mike Lang (webflier@erols.com), January 13, 1999.

We could plant a Furby in one of the stealth rubber duckys.
Gotta bring that up to Fruitcake League.

But first, for our inspiration at human ingenuity, especially from the younger set not yet ossified:

Teen Invents Faster Encryption System

ASSOCIATED PRESSBLARNEY, Ireland, Jan. 13  A 16-year-old Irish schoolgirl is bringing more speed to Internet security.

Sarah Flannery from Blarney, in Irelands Cork County, is being hailed as a mathematical genius for devising a new encryption algorithm for encoding electronic mail  and is being flooded by job offers from computer firms, the Times of London said Wednesday.

HER NEW SYSTEM IS 10 times faster than the current RSA data protection algorithm, created by three students at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology in 1977, the paper said. Flannerys code is equally secure as well. She used 2X2 matrices in formulating her algorithm.

But Flannery, who unveiled the code to amazed judges at the Irish Young Scientists and Technology Exhibition last weekend, said she is considering publishing her discovery rather than patenting it because she does not want people to have to pay to use it.

I had to go through a lot of stuff before I finalized the theory, said Flannery, whose father, David, teaches mathematics at Cork Institute of Technology. I reached critical points where I would get stuck for three weeks or so. I just kept thinking about it and then the whole thing slipped into place.

Flannery named her algorithm the Cayley-Purser, after Arthur Cayley, an eminent 19th-century Cambridge mathematician, and Michael Purser, a cryptographer who inspired her.

She will now represent Ireland in the European Union Science Contest in Greece in September.

The Times did not say whether she would accept any of the job offers or any of the numerous scholarships also offered by universities.
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-- Leska (allaha@earthlink.net), January 13, 1999.

ROFL = Rolling on the floor, laughing ROFLAMO = rolling on the floor, lauging my ass off.

-- john (john@doe.com), January 13, 1999.

Leska,

From the mouths (and minds) of babes ... or furbys.

Maybe we should enact legislation so that the NSA can keep their Furbys to cuddle with. Then they might "see" things differently, or not. Or perhaps encourage a leftover fruitcake mail-in to the NSA. Come Y2K, we may need to share some of our weapons stash with them.

Diane

-- Diane J. Squire (sacredspaces@yahoo.com), January 13, 1999.

For follow-on, less govern-mental insanities, in the Yourdonite national security interest check out ...

Know Your Fruitcake! (not for the serious)

http://www.greenspun.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id= 000Imj

-- Diane J. Squire (sacredspaces@yahoo.com), January 14, 1999.

I understand that Linda Tripp has a large Furby collection. I guess she won't be working at the NSA anytime soon.

-- Bill (bill@microsoft.com), January 14, 1999.